A wise man will not even try to find the answer

 A wise man will not even try to find the answer.

“The greatest question that has never been answered and which I have not yet been able to answer ...is, “what does a woman want?”~Sigmund Freud

Let’s not even go there… I’ve never tried to figured it out. Simply because the answer does not ever stay fixed, or static, in the case of dealing with a woman. It will always keep changing. So how do I know this?  I’m a experienced computer Systems Analyst. And I have designed and written computer programs that have gone into infiniity loops, I did it on purpose a few time just to see what would happen, I never found the condition that there is no answer to that is logical, or a path you can take to satisfy that answer that keeps changing when every condition changes every time you believe you have hit the one condition that you believe that will answer that question is no longer the case. Crash, program failure!

OK. she does not like it when, I, as a man analysis her actions. 

But I should automatically know what she is thinking, at all times. Huh?  How?

As I practice writing and exploring my own feelings I often discover that generally, I can get upset with a woman for different reasons than I first think. By experiencing and feeling the deeper reasons, negativity tends to creep in and then  disappear, from time to time. Just as I suddenly can be gripped by negative emotions I can also suddenly release them. These are a few examples, I have that illustrates what I’m writing about: 

• Years ago … one morning I woke up feeling annoyed with my partner. Whatever she did disturb me for the first few hours. As I wrote her a text msg later I discovered that I was really upset with my mother for being so controlling when I was growing up. These feelings were just coming up because I had dreamed about my mom the night before and she was scolding me for something I neglected to do. As I texted my lady a love note I imagined I was back when I was feeling controlled, I instantly knew I was not in that situation at that point in time. After I texted the msgs suddenly I was no longer upset with my lady. 

• Whenever,  my profession was very demanding. I was always busy trying to meet a deadline at work. When I came home my now ex-wife felt extremely resentful and angry  because I was late coming home. One part of her understood the pressure  I was under, but emotionally she was still angry at me. She wrote me a letter, I found it the other day as I was going through some of my old papers. In her letter, she wrote she discovered that she was angry with her father for leaving her to grow up with a mother that resented having given birth to her as a teenage mother. As a child, she had felt powerless and abandoned most of the time, as her mother left her with her grandmother as she had to go to work, and these feelings were again coming up to be healed. She wrote a letter to me telling me about my not being home on time for dinner with the family….(which was only  sometimes, not all of the time) and she didn’t like it. Which made her angry at me (because of her father and mother’s neglect).  I hope she has gotten over it because I’m no longer in the picture.

 

• Women can think about the words she wants to hear as a good thing. Until a man says the “I love you” <smiling> and if he then tells her he wants to make a commitment. The next thing that happens is her mood suddenly changes. She begins to have a lot of doubts and her passion disappears, As she discovers that she was now angry with her father, for example, for being so passive and hurting her mother. She has to release her negative feeling before she can feel attracted to her guy again. 

Final thoughts 

  

Just as love or anger may bring up our past unresolved feeling, so does getting what you want, bring doubt in to play. I remember when I first learned about this. Many years ago I began to see a pattern in many situations. When I was challenged I was at my best at solving problems. When I wasn’t challenged --- not so much. My creativity needed to be challenged…. when things are too easy I get a bit relaxed, with a  BAD attitude. And do not give things, including relationships my best efforts....