Nice guys are Knights in full Armor!

You make me feel like  the luckiest
Woman in the world, I'm so very happy.

There is a consistent miss understanding in the dating circles, that "nice guys" always finish last.  To that I would say they don't finish last  because they are "nice!" they just don't run in the early races to come in first. .. they are trying  to "place " so that when the first place winner burns up all his energy winning the first race, he has no more spark to compete later in the final race. The "Nice guy", if choose as the last choice, by a lady with good taste ... "is a keeper", with enough reserved energy in his tank to do the following:

I can't believe you are willing to
untangle my hair for me

. He is ready and willing to please her.
. Spoil her
. Treat her with respect
. Compromise when he needs to.
. He is a lasting choice.

That final lap was the best, we kick A$$.

Instead of, like other contestant who will treat her as a winner's 1st place trophy prize. Women who understand that guys are competetive....may still not know, that these "nice guys" don't always run flat out at top speed to win.. in the preliminary races...placing is Ok. He is making sure he gets noticed, until the final race... The final is the key here. He conserve's his energy for the final stretch. A SMART man always has a strategy. If he happens to also be a nice guy then his qualities will shine brightly.

Nice guys do all of this and more!

BTW  when was  the last time a fine lady had to compete with other women for a nice guys attention? Would a nice lady have to compete for the attention of any guy? Most likely not!
Girls and even women compete for the bad-boys attention...who...will dismiss her when he is not interested or he will put her somewhere in the 1- 7 day rotation.
But a nice guy will put her on the top of his priority list 1-7 days weekly. The lady can reject this kind of nice guy if she wants, or try to put him on layaway. However she might just see him walking down the street with someone else, who stopped, and paid attention to him, for what she might have missed which is his kind gentlemanly nature therefore appreciate him for what you may have noticed. ..... way too late... or... flat out missed.
If a single available  woman does not pay attention to the good qualities  a good man possesses. Be assured, in this 10-1  women to men ratio, at least one of the other 9 ladies are scoping. You will see them  hand in hand  stroling, and wonder..... Why arent you "the one" with the knight in full shining Amor.
.

Trust your intelligence... if she brings a whole lot to the table.

Like a business merger you need to evaluate  what are her strengths...when you need backup and reinforcement.  If you know who she is... then expect her to do the following:

Speak her mind

A woman that cares for you will never be afraid to tell you when you are wrong and when you make a mistake. This does not mean she should bring you down or underestimate you, instead it is constructive criticism that can help you grow as a person and become better. She will also warn you if you are about to make a bad choice. This kind of woman will also be your therapist and counselor you can always trust and lean on. If she is true to herself, she will also be true to you.

She is a smart-strong woman

A woman does not have to be strong just physically, but also emotionally. Guys fall for women who are confident and have strong personalities. These women are independent and they are constantly working on their personal growth. A woman who is emotionally strong is always appreciated because she knows how to take care of herself. She can also be vulnerable at times, which is when you need to protect her and show her you care and you will always be there.

She has a fiery passion

Every relationship has its own ups and downs, but when there is passion both partners will work out every situation no matter how hard it is. Being with a passionate person will bring excitement every day in your life. If there is no spark between you, you can’t expect for your relationship to be strong and lasting. A passionate woman will show her nature in everything she does whether it is cooking or showing you how she feels.

She is your strength

Most people can’t tell why they have fallen in love with their partner. This is a great sign of true love because if you love someone enough you will never count reasons why you have fallen for them. True love means you don’t have a particular reason why you love the person you do. So, if you have realized that your partner is everything in your life don’t wait until you tell her that. Make sure she knows you want to spend your life with her and that you are very happy 

You can kickback and relax have drink and a cigar
knowing you have a solid relationship.

Identify why she is great and hold on to her for a greater life.

A few Signs you should do your best to keep her

If your lady has some of the following personality traits you should never let her go.

I know you are surprised
but we men know a good woman
when we see one!

1.She is always supportive regardless of the situation

Finding the right person is very difficult, however it is much more difficult to find someone who will be there for us during the hardest times. The ideal partner is someone who will never grow tired of you, someone who wants to know how your day went, someone who will offer you a shoulder to lean on, someone who laughs with you. If you want to live a happy and long life make sure your partner is someone who will stay with you. Nowadays people get bored very fast and once you start thinking they will be there for you, they are gone. However, having a partner who will show you that you will never be alone anymore and you can always count on her is the one that will help you overcome any difficulty in your life.

2.She is beautiful by your definition

Beauty is something that does not have one particular definition. Every person considers different things beautiful or awesome. And if your lady is the one you find the most beautiful then you need to show her how much you love her every day. You should never stop appreciating the person you love and you must show her you really care about her.

3.She is kind, caring and gives you lots of attention

Compassion and kindness are very important qualities in a partner that you must never ignore. There is very little kindness in the world, and having a kind person by your side can help you achieve even the impossible things. A kind person will inspire you to become a better person. If your partner pays attention to everything you say you should never let her go. This means she will consider all the things that concern you and she will make an effort to learn more about you even if you don’t like sharing too much info. She will want to know what your favorite ice cream is, how you prefer your coffee, tea or her ( wrapped in a towel). She will want to know what is making you sad and/or mad when you are not feeling up to dealing and she will try her best to make you feel better.

4.She is full of positive vibes

There is lots of negativity all around us which makes it hard for us to remain positive. But, if your lady is able to bring positivity in you no matter how hard your day is, you must not let her go. Having a person like that is  bliss. Living with a positive person will never make your life boring or monotonous. A woman that is energetic, lively and happy will make your life a bigger adventure. Positivity is a very important aspect of our lives and if your partner is the person who will guide you to the light at the end of the tunnel, hold on to her and don't  give her a reason to go.

If you let her walk out that door
 you will live to regret it everyday.

5.She loves you to the moon and back

This is the most important factor on this list because if there is no love you wouldn’t even consider someone a part of your life. You are also probably reading this because you have that special person. Never let go of a woman who loves you from the bottom of her heart. She will cherish your presence even if you are sitting in complete silence. Finding a person who will love you unconditionally is extremely rare. Make sure you show her how important she is to you in order to give her a reason to stay.

6.She believes in give and take

Compromise requires at least two people. So, if you want to settle for something you are not so comfortable with, your partner will probably return the favor when it is the other way around. A woman who cares for the relationship will be prepared to compromise, but don’t always expect that from her. One of the keys to a successful relationship is compromise from both partners.

7.She is at the home you want to come to

If you want to settle down, you probably have a person in mind that you believe will be your best life journey partner. When you find the right person you know you want to come to them every day. You will never waste time and you will want to spend as much as as possible.

Daddy are there other men like you out there?

How Your Relationship With Your Father Affects Who and How You Date

THE MOST AMAZING question I saw in an article.

Could your low expectations of men or your quick ability to praise them have more to do with your father than you thought?

My thoughts in response:

Believe it or not, the dynamics between you and dear old dad will always play a part in your romantic connections with men in your life – there’s just no getting around it.

Women often jokingly blame their “daddy issues” for mistakes they’ve made when dating or navigating a marriage, but the reality is, it’s serious business. Your father is your first male role model—good or bad—and that relationship often shapes how we view men.

Connecting the dots between your relationship with your father and your romantic relationships with other men can be difficult without the help of a licensed professional, but there are signs you can look out for to give you more insight into the romantic choices you’re making.

There are many ways relationships with our fathers can affect our own romantic ones.“They can cause fear of abandonment, inability to trust, low expectations of men and even feelings of insecurity or security.

If your relationship with your father resembles one of these common scenarios, allow me to offers some related signs to stay on the lookout for.

You Have An Absentee Dad

Signs to lookout for: You’re clinging on and wanting to be with him all of the time. You may have fear of abandonment or rejection, stay in unhealthy relationships or bounce from person to person because of fear of being without a man. You may also be codependent, try hard to please the men you date and could be constantly checking his phone or social media.

You Have An Emotionally Unavailable Dad

Signs to lookout for: ‘You might assume all men are the same and therefore you don't expect anything different from them. You may also assume you are unlovable or unwanted and keep distance from men to avoid getting hurt. You may act like you don't care but you do; you are just fearful.

Your Dad Is Abusive, Mean, or Not Loving

Signs to lookout for: You will more than likely pick someone the extreme opposite of your father. You could have difficulty trusting others, problems committing, an dexpect the worst so you sabotage relationships first. You may be angry with men and therefore create conflict.

You Have A Healthy Relationship and Supporting, Loving, Present Dad.

Here is my personal response as I'm a man: My dad was a great Dad, My mom often told me I was very much like him.
Since he was a very good rollmodel... I think it also made me the kind of guy a woman like my mom would be attracted to. For the record my mom was very strong no nonsense woman. Her dad was also  a great roll model as she often spoke very highly about him, as did all my aunts. So if it's in my DNA I got it from both sides .... I've hopefully  passed these genes on to my two sons. Both have respect for women... as they have great relationships with their mom. I might write a post about men and the effects their mom's have on their relationships.

Some husbands are feeling entitled... which is causing problems for wives

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Good marriage or relationship is something most people strive for. When there is patience and understanding from both partners the relationship is healthy and happy. However, there are certain things that people do without knowing how harmful they can be for their love life.

These are the 8 most common mistakes people make that can ruin relationships.

1.Not paying attention to the physical and emotional needs of the partner

This is something very important because when you start neglecting your partner’s needs he/she will also feel less need to satisfy yours. In return they could start looking for someone else that will be able to fulfil them which can result in an end of your relationship.

2.Expecting your partner to change because of you

Every person has flaws which can be of different nature. This does not give you the right to ask your partner to make changes just because you asked for. Even if your partner agrees to change just for the sake of your relationship it does not mean the change will be just like you imagined it. The best thing is to accept your partner the way they are.

3.Always winning an argument

Most couples argue just to prove who is right. This is just the ego trying to dominate, but instead of proving who is right, try to discuss the problem in order to find a solution that works for both of you.

4.Involving a third person

Another very common mistake is when couples let a third person become involved in their relationship. This can be a member of the family or a close friend you trust. But, you can never be sure how mature that person is and if they are actually capable of solving your problem. They can even make it worse, so try to solve your disputes alone with your partner, after all they concern only the two of you.

5.Disrespecting your differences

Each person is different in their own way so in order to show your partner that you respect them you need to accept the differences between the two of you. This is the only way to keep your relationship healthy.

6.Not accepting fault

Letting your ego take over instead of accepting you were wrong can also have negative consequences. Instead, try to say sorry however you need to mean it and apologize to your partner. Ego should never be bigger than love in your relationship. Once your partner sees you are capable of admitting your mistakes, they will also do the same when they make one.

7.Lack of communication

A relationship can never be successful if there is no healthy communication. You need to discuss every problem no matter how small or insignificant it seems, because failure to do so could end your relationship.

8.Differences in opinions

Just like I already mentioned, every person is different which means every person has different desires and opinions. For example, if you want to start a family and your partner wants to wait a little more, you should discuss an option that will work for both of You.

Curves and curls...why are some folks not liking them

So you can Like ....what you like, or don't like what you don't like... about black women... the variety  is, what makes, them standout. Never bland never exactly the same, as the rest....she is royal and  that's a fact.  

 

She sits and your eyes  look from head to toe because you are Amazed.

As you approach her you notice so many things that are eye catching

The female athletes still look like women!

Strong female!

The Pictures on the wall do not grab you attention no way as much as she does.

Just checkout what the guys in the Caribbean see every day. 

Even the guys on magazine cover appreciate the A+ eye candy just look at their eyes.

Very little difference in 20 years, wow.

When a wise black woman speaks, you can't help but listen... at least I do!

Let's talk respect before we talk about compromise

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Some signs Your new Partner Doesn’t Respect You

Respect and compromise are two sides of the same coin.

One of the key elements of a healthy relationship is respect, however at the beginning it is difficult to see whether your partner truly respects you. Even though it is often obvious that you are being disrespected, it is sometimes hard to see the signs particularly because everyone has a different definition about respect.

Respect is something that can’t be measured which is why little research has been done regarding this topic. However, psychologists have been able to create a definition about respect which includes the following:

• love
• caring
• understanding
• honesty
• loyalty
• listening
• not being abusive or judgmental
• being considerate

Most of the subjects in the study had the same concept about respect and they agreed that the following 5 things are a definite sign that your partner is being disrespectful.

1.He/she tells you what is wrong with you

Majority of people are aware of their own flaws which is why there is no need for constantly pointing them out. Some find it very difficult to accept themselves with all their flaws so being reminded about them is not very helpful.

If your partner does this to you it is a clear sign that he/she is disrespectful. Talk openly about how this makes you feel and let them know you are aware that you are not perfect.

2.He/she doesn’t listen to you

Respect can also be shown through the ability to listen carefully to what your partner is telling you. The communication breaks down if one of the people in the conversation keeps interrupting the other or seems distant.

Besides listening, responding is also a very important part of a healthy conversation because it shows you are fully present in the moment.

I'm listening to you,
 I'm just making sure you don't trip
And fall ....

3.He/she always does things his/her way

Being in a healthy relationship means having the same and equal rights. No one should always be right or have things their way. One of the keys to a respectful relationship is being able to compromise. There is that word most question the need for... I repeat COMPROMISE.

If you partner insists on having full control over your relationship it means he/she does not respect you enough to value your opinions and needs. Talk about what bothers you and try to point out that you are not going to accept that unkindly kind of behavior.

4.He/she disrespects your friends and family

Let’s face it, your partner will never love your friends and family as much as you do. However, this does not mean that he/she should treat them without respect. If you get married in the future this could become even a bigger issue.

Having a good relationship with your partner’s friends and family is very important if you want to spend the rest of your life with that person.

5.He/she is constantly unkind

Harming other people especially if it is intentional, is a red flag that your partner is being disrespectful. Attacking someone whether it is physically or verbally shows how little your partner cares about you or other people’s feelings. He/she should know that everyone is responsible for their own words and actions and he needs to know the consequences of that kind  behavior.

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