A women strength comes from what she experienced!

Ladies ladies ladies.... I have known many strong black women in my life maybe more than many other men, starting with my grandmother, my mother, and aunts. my female cousins they were all married (but yet very strong) because of who they were raised by and married to, a husband/father who made them all self starters. My grand father had 7 daughters. they all have the same type of strengths, even though they are not all by the same woman. I would say many strong black women these days are that way because they have to be assertive...... Men (especially black-men) are now having to step aside because assertive women run things. they are BOSS . 

Look at Jada Pinket Smith, she is a strong black-woman who is not single. She compliments her husband's strengths. she did not have a good father- figure in her early life....so she married one But how many Mr. Will Smith's are there out there with his charm and earning capabilities these days. For black women to not be single they have to make a few choices, either settle for man earning less than them, and lead them (men with great pride might have serious problem with this one). because there are fewer male leaders who know how to treat a good woman, they may have to settle for a whole lot less than they would want. Just look around at who the pack of wolves are following. these are Not men who are setting good examples, period. so unless women are willing to be prey. they will have to avoid the wolf packs....
Father's should be around to help their daughter make wise choices. If your real Dad isn't around then make sure you find a male figure that has a better than average character to help you.
So who really  invented the Games?

the first rule of courtship... Play hard to get? Right! Well that worked in the early years, but as time  floats by like clouds on  windy days. the "playing hard to get" is no  longer a smart move.
the fact that single women have to play in an arena with competition . where the big time games are played, competing with other single women and even married women. this can be best explained in a cause and effect essay.
Start Distinguishing  between cause and effect. To determine causes, ask, "Why did this is happening?" To identify the  effects, ask, "What happened because of this?" The following is an example of one cause producing one effect:

Cause:You are out of gas, because you didn't tank up when you should have.

Effect: Your car won't start.

Sometimes, many causes contribute to a single effect or many effects may result from a single cause.  so a fill up on high octane gas might be your best bet. to be able to  get your motor started again. Like "Stella got her groove back" So when you come  across someone who has all the attributes you are looking for. But then you hit the brakes and your mind starts wondering what is an acceptable number of previous sex partners.    News flash: Counting The number of sex partners is like being at  the age  if  you are  you passed your 20th birthday .... it only sounds like a whole lot if you are  counting  using your fingers and toes. and you are  calling each toe  a piggy. and each finger as a primary  choices based on finger size.  so their stock is dropping with each finger you count.  so the following question becomes the multiple choice answers based on  what you have to  choose between:  

The following 4 issues are the ultimate steps you need to get working......ASAP 

Compromising

Compromising with one another is a key factor in keeping a relationship  happy and successful for all individuals who are involved. Learning to compromise is necessary from both individuals who have decided to get together and committed  to one another. Once you are able to easily compromise with your partner it is much less likely you are going to trigger an argument or conflict which can negatively impact your relationship altogether.

Financial Management

Learning to manage your finances more strictly and carefully is also ideal to avoid potential conflict related to money issues once you are living with  your significant other. Financial management skills come in handy when you want to build your credit, apply for a new credit card or even take out a loan as a couple with excellent credit history. Getting your finances in order is a way to ensure you are moving forward in the right direction even before you are officially married to new your spouse.
  Communication
Communication is one of the most important skills to master before getting married, regardless of how long you have been dating your significant other. Ensuring you are both capable of communicating openly and honestly at all times is a way to work through potential issues or problems you may need to overcome as a couple in the future. Having the ability to communicate your true thoughts and feelings without becoming defensive is also beneficial not only for marriage, but also other relationships in your everyday life.      
Listening Skills


Listening is essential to improve and grow on any type of relationship, including the relationship you want to have with your significant other once you are living together or  married to one another. Having the ability to openly listen while actively engaging in others’ stories and thoughts is a way to build and gain trust while also showing respect to family members, friends and your spouse. Showing your significant other that you genuinely care about their thoughts is possible by nodding yes while listening, making eye contact and asking additional questions relevant to the stories they are sharing.

                          

   

                                                            

She is a Ticking time bomb!

One minute she's fine and life is good, then she set the time on the bomb.. The next minute it is as if the World is ending; your woman/girlfriend is crying, screaming and stamping her foot like an overly pampered brat. How did this happen? To us men , women will always be complex creatures and there’s no point in thinking that one day we will understand their ways. However, here someone  covered 10 key things that women say and explain to you what they really mean.   followed by my BAD perspective:

When a  women says: ‘I’m not upset’

When a woman says that she is fine, she often is far from OK. What she really means is: “the issue we were just talking about is still upsetting me, but I’m too embarrassed or too angry to continue with our ‘discussion’ (AKA argument)”. When she says she is fine, tell her that: ‘I know you too well and I know you are not fine. I want to help you and sort this situation out, but I can’t until you let me know what is wrong.”
 My BAD perspective: AS a man you want to help, but if you are an experienced man,  you know she's more upset with you for breathing in her space than whatever is upsetting her. It might me you being a man  that is all she needs to hate you for  at that point in time We are Mr. fix it and she is thinking I don't want you to fix nothing  here, Junior, you should have prevented from happening in the first place.! 

When a women say: ‘It’s up to you’

Careful; you’re in dangerous territory if your girl says that ‘it’s up to you’. This is a test and your decision is going to be judged. The chances are if she says it’s up to you, you have two choices; the first will be the choice that you want to do, like going to a bar with friends and watching the game. The second choice will be something that shows you are a committed, caring boyfriend, but won’t be something you particularly want to do. To make a decision you need to weigh up the consequences of doing what you want against the pleasure you will get.
My BAD perspective: Let me explain something here. IT'S NEVER UP TO YOU! you are given enough rope  to hang yourself. the branch is already there, for your lynching, Whatever you do she will be upset with you for making that choice. NO matter what it is unless, you have  the ability to take her to that  dream spot she has been looking at in that travel magazine she left on the coffee table. and you ignored.  

When women say: ‘It did not mean anything’

If the love of your life cheats on you and says it did not mean anything then she’s lying. She’s realized her mistake and knows that you’re the one that she now wants, but for women sex rarely, if ever, means nothing. She may have slept with that guy because she had feelings for him, or she may have slept with that guy because she’s miserable with you, but either way there was a reason and it is a big deal.

so you did someone else?

My BAD perspective: Wow, how do you swallow your pride and deal with this one Fella... she let some one into your zone, he might have hit her "G spot"  and she had a blast of an orgasm. These are now things that will be sterling around in your mind  for day and days on end. any man that forgive and forget is man who has no problem walking away. Simply because he could turn off his emotions or  he did not really care! 


When women say: ‘I’ll just pop in’

If you hear the words ‘I’ll just pop in’ cancel all your plans now because for the rest of Saturday afternoon you’re going to be stood outside the shop that your girl’s just gone into. Even if her intentions were pure, once inside she will get distracted and, because she knows you’ll be too uncomfortable and embarrassed to ask the shop assistants if they’ve seen you or wander into the fitting room, she knows that she’s safe and can spend up to an hour and a half buying the same skirt / shirt that she owns already.

so much good stuff to choose from.

My BAD perspective: Which guy loves shopping...? (maybe online)  this is an area of extreme boring painful punishment. What did you do to deserve this... is all that will be going through your mind. "She hates me and is  doing this to me to prove it," this  test is one that a good tablet and a WiFi connect  for streaming videos  can let you off the hook ... Because you can find things to do while you wait for hours. She will see you as patient. But you better answer when she she asks how do she looks in that outfit.  

When women say: ‘Of course you’re not fat’

Damn this still fits

If you ask your girl whether you’ve put on weight or if you are looking a little older, you cannot trust her answer. Although your girl wants you to look good, for women body issues are such a sensitive topic that they would never tell you that you were fat and piling on the pounds or that you were going grey. If you need an honest opinion on your looks, ask a guy friend.
My BAD perspective: Think Reverse science here... if you are stupid enough to ask, you deserve the answer you get.. you don't want to hear that you've gotten fat. This is  elementary Dear Watson.... she want you at home and not in the gym watching the Zumba ladies doing things she should be doing. Now your mind should be working over time. find ways to change how you look and surprise her.  You need to become  self motivated.  Then surprise her  as you pull out that vintage suede jacket that could no longer fit you and say to her: "  remember when I use to wear this."  and watch her eyes instantly follow the lines of your body, as it ow fits you just like back in the day..... Now that's PRICELESS!

When women say: ‘You don’t care’

No matter how many times you hear this it still hurts. Of course you care. However, she knows that you love her; when she says ‘You don’t care’ what she actually means is that she feels like you haven’t shown you care about her in a while. Next time she says this shower your girl in love, kisses and hugs and she’ll feel reassured.
My BAD perspective: Maybe you don't care but you better play it off as if you do care..... validation is very important.. end of subject! 

When women say: ‘Am I fat?’

When she asks whether she is fat or not a simple no answer will not suffice because your girl isn't actually asking whether you think she’s fat or not. What your girl is in fact asking is whether you think she’s attractive or not. The next time your girl asks you this question tell her – without any hesitation – that of course she’s not fat and that you find her so hot you sometimes can’t think about anything else but her.

Zumba classes!

My BAD perspective: SMH.... in other words LIE..... I figured out a long time ago. that beauty is in the eyes of the beholder only if you have 20/20 .  so admit to your  Lady that you are the worse at assessing her beauty now  because, You fell blindly in love with her a long time ago. and that image that got stamped in your brain is not erasable. your eye sight is no longer perfect because the image in your mind over rides all incoming views of her. Women love to be remembered the looked during  their best years.     


When women say: ‘We’ll see…’

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If the words ‘We’ll see’ are spoken to you at the end of a conversation then you should know that what your Lady partner really means is that she doesn't want to continue this conversation, but that the answer is a definite no. When your Lady says this to you she’s secretly hoping that she’ll delay you enough so that you’ll forget about whatever it was that you wanted in the first place.
My BAD perspective: Lets get the rules of the game on the table, right now. You were dealt the losing hand fellahs. If you want to win, you better forget it. Even if you reload the  deck  it  will always give you the same losing hand. So get your blocking pads out and defend the areas you value most.  

When women say: ‘I don’t feel like having sex with you right now’

Now, this phrase is a lot different from its close relation: ‘I don’t feel like sex right now’. If your woman says that she doesn't want sex right now but puts the emphasis on the ‘with you’ part, then you know that what she actually means is that she is unhappy and that you've done something wrong. Unlike you, if your girl is angry or upset with you she won’t want to jump into bed and will keep you away until you've made it up to her.
My BAD perspective:  Go figure you are angry at a person and someone ask you to do the one thing you know  will give them pleasure... so you are asking a woman to grant you the opportunity to do things to her that will make you happy. It's NOT going to happen. UNLESS you offer to do all the things that gives her what, you have not done  to her in the past, you acted  selfishly  sexually .... In that case you better be at your best of making her have 10 orgasms to your ONE in the future. Or you will not have nay Piece or Peace. which ever way you spell the words the sound the same. 
     


When women say: ‘Did you hear that?’

You’re just slipping into a great dream when your girl turns over in bed and whispers in your ear ‘Did you hear that?’ With all your might you try not to wake up, but you quickly plunge back into reality. So, why does your girl ask this just as you are nodding off? She’s bored and fed up that you always manage to sink soundly into sleep before she does.
My BAD perspective: You, fellahs, are supposed to be the one to sleep with one eye open, all the time.  How could you shirk your  guard duty and fall asleep at your post,  she needs to feel like you are there to give her protection, and comfort, not to fall asleep on the job. 
There you go again! messing up!