we men do not appreciate a black woman hair

 

We Black Men Don't Like Black Women hair, like we should

Everywhere from pop culture to the hood, men are either consciously or subconsciously telling black women they aren't "wanted."

Let me start by saying this: I know writing this blog post is going to cause quite a bit of controversy, so let's get this out of the way: I am an intelligent, definitely not what society deems "ghetto," and from what I am told, and given where I worked in the corporate world, I am fairly attractive. Why is that necessary to say? Let's start below.

Black men don't like black women curly hair enough. Yes, there  I said it. I don't mean all black men, but it's true of many, and it's a growing problem. I think I wouldn't really care if other races felt this way about black women, but the fact that we  black men do.... . Let me not be an hypocrites. I have date even lived with women of liter completions and straight hair.

My friend and I were having a conversation about black men vs. black women. (He is black and Puerto Rican mix. there we have the real problem), where as I'm all black with a Latino first and middle name  we feel the need to always find the other culture in a person and  to identify it. It started getting intense, and I said, "You don't get it! we Black men are viewed as somewhat  sexy and, in a sense, a 'trophy' for other races, if we have money but black women are never deemed the most attractive. Other races are always seen as a trophy on the arm of a black man.

He looked at me like I was crazy and said, "You don't understand the pure black-man's struggles, because like me you are not all black. They look at black inner city black men  like  criminals, an you and me don't fit the stereo type.

In a sense, I might not. But I thought in my head, 'At least many black women value black men like me. It's becoming rare to see the reverse.'

This all started because I was referencing a conversation we'd had when I was with my pregnant now ex-wife with our first born son. My friend had said lightheartedly, "I hope your son has better  hair. than your wife" he , Mr. P.R has, softer curls, a genetic gift from both his races combination.

He said, "B, I see you struggle with your hair, keeping it short, and I think it would be nice if he had my curly hair. You wouldn't want him to have coarse hair if you could help it. It would be easier to manage if his hair was curly was all I'm saying."

I'm showing some Ethiopian and Eritrea women, in this post  with softer hair. 

they were never colonized so  their people never shipped to the Western world. their features look so much like black Latinas.  this could make you go Hmm, how did that happen?

What was he trying to say about my choice in  mates, my woman has kinky hair?

Ugandan

Everywhere  men are either consciously or subconsciously telling black women they aren't "wanted." I have seen black men not even look twice at black women whom I see as beautiful, yet I've seen them break their necks for decent-looking -- dare I say unattractive -- women of other races. Huh?

Why are rap songs all about white women? If you think I'm wrong, listen to your music and get back to me.

Granted, I think everyone is entitled to a personal preference regarding whom they like. But when, as a black man, you start saying things such as, "I don't date black women; I don't find them attractive," I think we have an issue.

Even Psychology Today published an article about black women being unattractive. (It's since been taken down.)

Black men, your mommy is black. Your sisters are black. Your favorite aunt is black. Do you think they're all unattractive?

As I've gotten older, I've met many men who will openly say they don't want a baby with a black woman. They want a baby with "light skin or light eyes and good hair."

IF I HEAR. THAT. STATEMENT. ONE. MORE. TIME. I. WILL. LOSE. IT.

Black men, if you don't support your black women, how do you expect them to be able to support you?

I never understood why it makes a certain type of black man feel good to have a white woman on his arm. It would be one thing if it were true love, but some are just doing it because they see it as a prize. Trophy!

Even on social media, my heart will sink as I see black women I've known from high school or elementary school now say they're "black and Filipino," "black and Puerto Rican," "black and [whatever race]" -- just don't say you're fully black! It seems these women have been conditioned to think they're not worthy if they're "just black."

These statements below are the most common things I hear about why black men don't like black women:

"Black women have too much attitude/ghetto."

Before I met my then girlfriend's mother in person, she thought I was mixed with white. No kidding. From the way I spoke on the phone to the way I "acted, The point of this is that I don't have an attitude problem, nor am I ghetto. I will get an attitude over normal things, like any man would. I have friends of many backgrounds, and I've seen Asian women, Caucasian women and Latina women all get an attitude (mind-blowing, right?)

I have many black friends who would prefer to not be confrontational and would rather pretend an event never happened than address it.

Most of my friends are educated -- some more educated than their significant others -- and grew up in families from middle- to upper-class backgrounds.

Black women are attractive. but society does not think so. But we have been conditioned to prefer the less curly hair. My advise to black men who prefer other women of other cultures consider North Eastern African women 

 Eritrean

Ethiopian