Always Make a Great First, Second and Third Impression.

How do you get rid of the nervousness of meeting someone for the first time?
The K.I.S.S. method (12 simple things to remember) can help! 

During the first 7 seconds of a first meeting we make no less than 11 judgments about each other, assessing in a flash everything from the other person's educational level and competence to their wealth and political stripe. Given the speed at which impressions are formed, it's no snap to control how you're perceived. Nonetheless, you can tip the odds in your favor by avoiding a few common mistakes and keeping some key concepts in mind. If you’re meeting someone for the first time and breaking the ice, you’re guaranteed to blow the competition away.

Polish Thyself

I know, you know. Neat, clean, impeccable, shined = Respect. When in doubt about the proper level of formality in dress for a first meeting, opt for the more formal. Check out PitBull's tie. i.e. these new age  millionaires have figured out that the more presentable they look the greater the opportunities.

Scan the News

Before your meeting, check out the headlines. Current events often come up in the course of a conversation. If you arrive for an lunch or a cup of coffee unaware that (Jennifer Lopez will soon be in the club every night Leading the Cougars on the dance floor) it's not likely you are up to speed on everything so pick one that you can show that you are rolling with the times. Hey.... return to Earth this is about the person you are meeting (not Jenny from the block) so reference the News and move on.

Watch the Clock

Being early is nearly as BAD as being late. Besides looking like you have nothing better to do than wait,  you risk making the other person feel rushed. If necessary, kill some time in a Mature Cinema around the corner..... No not a Harry Potter movie. Don't show up and announce yourself even 5 minutes early, just be on time.

Give Yourself a Speech

If you set your mind just right, your brain will steer you through most situations. Moments before the first meeting, give yourself a quick pep talk (practice in front of mirror if possible,) reminding yourself of your ambition: to convey, first, your enthusiasm about and mastery of your initiative, and second—and this is the part we often overlook—your respect for what the person you're meeting with has to offer. Lots of us are good at outlining our plans for World conquest, but less good at honoring the other person's importance to the scheme. He/she has to feel they are getting their props.

Flash Teeth

Before you're even greeted, smile. People feel more confident when they're smiling. You're upbeat, warm, delighted to be here. "Don't use a closed-lip smile. It can look smug."
Follow Covey's advice
We have no advice better than Habit #5 from Steven Covey's book, The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People: "Seek first to understand, then to be understood." Pair that with the immortal words often credited to Yogi Berra: "You can observe a lot just by watching." People aren't impressed by the self-absorbed. So ask questions. Find out his/her issues.

Let Him/Her See Through You

"Many believe a poker face is a strategic advantage. But often, you gain credibility only when you're completely open. You want to achieve transparency, a sense that you're confident enough to be self-critical. If he/she accurately cites a shortcoming, cop to the flaw, but in a positive way: "You're right about that, and I'm committed to improving my softball skills." Awareness of both your strengths and your weaknesses makes you seem mature and ambitious, even if you're juvenile and lazy. 

Slow Down Just a Bit

When we're nervous, we tend to talk faster than when we're relaxed. Make a deliberate effort to speak just a little more slowly than you normally do. Also, modulate your voice, changing its pitch and volume, and vary your talking pace.

Expose Yourself (NO, not that way)

Don't sit with your arms crossed. It can come across as defensive or, even worse, judgmental.

Look, but Don't be a Starry Eyed contact shows that you're interested and, further, that you're not afraid they'll recognize you from the wanted posters they saw in the Post office. But holding their gaze too long can come across as intimidating. Every 5 seconds or so, break your glance off and peek quickly to the left or the right of the person.

Settle for Simple

This is not the meeting where you explain your theory of exactly how marketing has been transformed forever by Eminem. Go for clear. Save your fascinating, paradigm-busting insights for later.

Get Out of There, Gratefully

Be sure the meeting ends before the first awkward silence tells you it's been over for 5 minutes. Your exit sentence is built around a "thank you" sentiment, but you are not grateful because he/she's such a great man/woman and you're such a nothing (unless they are 30 years older than you). You're grateful because you've enjoyed exchanging ideas with another smart, busy person.

Become a Correspondent

In this e-mail era, the power of a note sent to their Facebook account is a follow-up that can be dramatic! A few words can conveys professionalism and thoughtfulness. To send an E-mail  you need that contact info, so if you don't have it. Check Facebook, it shows you are willing to contact them without seeming like a hacker. Avoid doing the hasty, which come across as an attempt to cross something off a to-do list.


Good luck, remember there are no "Do-overs" in the real World.