Don't show that you are the hotest person in the room!

Whether you’re looking for a new relationship  or not, you’ve probably been encouraged to “network, network, network!” more times than you can count. Are all those 'meet and greet events' you’re attending leading to new connections or opportunities?

No? You’re not the only one. Many networking newbies have tendencies that actually inhibit building real relationships with their new contacts.

The good news: it’s not that hard to fix. Here’s what you might not even realize you’re doing wrong—and what to do about it.
You’re talented! some what Eager! you show that  you are Ambitious! You have lots of ideas to share! And you want to make sure that every person you meet at the event knows who you are and what you do!

I get it. And yes, sharing your story with new contacts is important. But sharing your life story is overkill: Nothing can set a person off more than an potentially interesting  person who takes no interest in anything beside his/her own needs and  wants.

The Fix: Take Some Interest. Stop highlighting your latest accomplishment and start listening instead. Find people with similar  careers or interest as you, and ask them questions: How did you get your start? What do you love about your life experiences, and what do you wish you could change? By taking an interest in your contact, you will make him/her feel valued—and hopefully interested in continuing the pursued of a relationship. And you’ll likely gain some new insights, too.

Mistake #1: Expecting a Relationship

You’re looking for a new relationship, so you hit the circuit of 'meet and greet events' every week, asking every person you meet  key questions. Well, yes. But give people some credit: If you pursue networking opportunities purely for the relationship prospects, your contacts will figure you out. You will leave them feeling interviewed, and they will be less likely to recommend you to someone that might be good match for you.
The Fix: Provide Some Value. If you’re looking for a relationship, don’t show  it—work for it. Do some research into what your contact does both in and out of work and find ways that you can contribute your time or support. Perhaps you could volunteer your expertise in social media for the big convention she’s heading up, or offer your accounting knowledge for her non-profit organization. Provide some opportunity for contacts to see you in a working light, and you’ll be that much closer to a good referral.

Mistake #2: Not showing that you are thankful.

You attended a large event last week and grabbed coffee with one of your new  contacts afterward. And then—the week got busy, and you didn’t get around to saying thank you. She’ll understand, right?
Maybe. But if you don’t show gratitude, even in the smallest (or largest) event, you risk leaving a negative impression—probably not the desired outcome of your meeting.

The Fix: Just Do It. Whether you pack notecards in your purse for post-meeting scribbles, set yourself a reminder on Gmail to send off a quick note, or just insert a quick “thanks for taking time to meet with me!” at the final handshake, you must say 'thank you.' Not only will you solidify your reputation as a courteous individual, but you won’t be leaving your contacts with a bad taste in their mouths. Always say thank you, and your good impression will last until your next gathering.

Mistake #3: don't act like you are the hottest person in the room, unless you are a flamenco Dancer.
OK everyone likes a Alpha female but most are intimidated by Alpha anything.
If you look and act too hot then everyone will step carefully towards you and turn right or left because they don't want to be rejected. while you evaluate who is worthy of have a simple conversation with you.

The Fix: Just act natural,

The "Here she comes Miss America song," is not who you want to appear to be  when you are tying to meet someone new. Can you here the trumpets?
So make yourself approachable, smile and shake hands with warmth and smile.