4/23/2013

Being Scarred mentally does not show, when someone first meet you.

Books, TV series  and movies sometimes make titles look sexy. there is nothing sexy about being  "scarred ."
What do scars reveal about us? They indicate that something went wrong in our past... Do they make us jaded, cynical, less trusting, always on guard, never relaxed, ready for the worst? Does a scandal in your past remind you of happy times? I don't think so. I guess there are scars that are sexy. Scandals that are made to look sexy  by adding a sexy face or/and  body to the picture. It's always about married men or women doing something scandalous with a younger single member of the opposite sex. I'm not being judgmental here, but I have to say an affair with a single older/younger person who is not married is not a scandal maker because the affair is acceptal in today's society, unless one of the parties is in a committed relationship. We need to find reasons after a painful breakup.to justify to ourselves why we should start and pursue new relationships is often slowed down by hesitation. The scars need to heal but they  will not stay hidden forever. No amount of makeup will coverup emotional scars, which will leave a person emotionally spent and often defensive about thing they might say and do, and the new person may not have the patience to deal with your healing period.
How will a new new person react when the true you is revealed. Will there be understanding or will there be what you fair most. The one thing that will make this easier is being honest from the moment your eyes meet. Answer inquiry questions.....  truthfully and find ways to make the new person understand that they will have to be the cause of you being 'the best You' if you and this new person hookup. Many guys will give you a piggyback ride in the beginning... women will never!

 But if you are not honest from the start they will start questioning if you will have his back or just ride his back for all your personal gains. If you  have the perfect job, the perfect house, and  once had the perfect relationship, you will also have comparison issues. When tragedy strikes, your  world could  takes a devastating turn. You may vow to yourself  to never  love again. If you don’t allow another man/woman into your heart, then there’s no reason for you go through the possibility to feel the pain of a loss again. This plan may seem  to work, but it will be put to the test when you can’t stand the suffering any longer.

When a new love possible Love interest   learns about you  loss,(scar revealed)  he/she might want nothing more than to be there for you. Will his/her love and determination make you strong enough to give faith second chance, or will your fear of losing another love make you run away?

Firstly, let me defend the position of taking time to heal by saying most women don’t cheat while in a relationship, at least not in the same way men do. Especially when they’re in an established relationship/ like engaged or married; and are happy. If they’re really into a dude, they’re loyal from the first kiss. Faithfulness is hardwired into most female circuitry, like they  need to cuddle and buy shoes.

Now, the unfortunate exception: some do. Okay, a lot do: 39 % of women will act on the urging of their cheating hearts at least once, according to recent surveys. And if a woman is going to cheat, there are surprisingly common times when she’s likely to do it. Pay attention, because even if you’re sure your woman would never cheat, the urge may pop up at one of these times.Where as, we men don't have a specific time to cheat, it can happen just because our favorite team lost the Superbowl and we need to have someone, who will share that moment and not say "hey! it was just a stupid game, get over it." I'm just being BAD here, sex and sports have nothing in common. Right?  

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