11/29/2011

Vote Up or Down on our Economy

"A lot of times, people don't know what they want until you show it to them" STEVE JOBS.

What is the most interesting thing ABOUT THE ECONOMY these days? Some would say its the debates of what is not working with the Economy. Others will say its having the Wealth  being  controlled by Bankers and the top 5%. While even more people will say its the Election for the next leader of the Free World..... Why is this debate so complicate for most? Because everyone is not realizing the one thing that makes the World Economy thrive..... its all about "Confidence."  

Allow me to explain.  When I read this book, Influence: How Women's Soaring Economic Power Will Transform Our World For The Better, Author Maddy Dychtwald is a nationally recognized demographer, marketing executive, and entrepreneur. I was struck by the fact that of all the shifts that is currently taking place the one that was created by women’s economic independence stands out in the most compelling way. Which may prove to be its adverse impact on men—their values, their expectations, and their very definition of manhood. 
Boomer women--the first generation of women to enter the workforce and stay in the workforce; is the first generation to build careers like their husbands and fathers--have paved the way by example, demonstrating that gender doesn’t necessarily define our roles in our family and in our life.
“Men are where women were in the 1980’s,” explains Michael Kimmel, a sociology professor at the State University of New York at Stony Brook, and author of Guyland: The Perilous World Where Boys Become Men. "Guyland takes up where Real Boys left off...a must-read for parents, teachers, coaches, young women who are so confused by the guys in their midst-and for guys themselves who yearn to break free of unwritten rules that leave them half a man, rather than a whole person.” Back in the day, women were adding career to their repertoire; today, more and more men are adding care— for children, for aging parents, for communities ills. While some (okay, many) might call men’s engagement on the home front somewhat belated, this overdue participation may, in fact, be setting the stage for the move towards a partnership society.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m not talking about some revolutionary “feminization” of men, where they simply swap roles with women, putting on aprons while women wear suits. What’s happening isn’t role reversal: It’s role reinvention. It’s a full- blown paradigm shift, one that gives both men and women more options when it comes to providing for their families and expressing their own talents and strengths. In this new social order, both genders are less shackled by a narrow vision of career success. Men in this new world have more social and workplace support for becoming involved fathers, equal partners in their homes and communities, and more complete people.
This change in the way we live is going on right now, in ways that are so obvious and self-evident that it’s easy to miss just how groundbreaking they really are. Men are reimagining their life just as boomer women shifted theirs twenty or thirty years ago, hoping to create lives that include important responsibilities at home as well as at work.
Case in point: When Myra Strober, a labor economist who teaches at Stanford’s Graduate School of Business, started teaching her course on “Work and Family” in the early 2000s, only a handful of men signed up. Today, men represent 40 percent of her class. Why? “More and more men are interested in being good dads,” she says of her students. “They also want to be good husbands and be supportive of their wives, or they have the kids for  the weekend." 
Let’s not forget that boomer women are the mothers of many of these men who are eager to take on new roles and responsibilities. This redefinition of fatherhood is happening in millions of families around the country, where fathers are spending many more hours with their children every week than their fathers spent with them. We see signs of it all around us as the most high- flying, type- A dads who drop their kids off at day care and duck out for soccer games and growing numbers of dads take paternity leaves, telecommute, or use flex- time.
The solution isn’t a broad political movement toward a new fatherhood, It’s the day-to-day accommodations that men are making, where they’re compromising and adopting new family arrangements that demand more from them at home. And they’re finding they’re actually enjoying it. Because they have shifted some of the Business headaches to their wives. There are more Women in the Business world today on the  Caribbean Island of St. Maarten, (for example) were women are in Key positions. However they are not being paid what men would be paid. More women head Companies in the USA dealing with the day-to-day issues in the Economy, they are not being paid what men were paid.......
Shifting to this new model of fatherhood can be acutely uncomfortable, even painful for some men. And this maybe causing the LACK of confidence in our Economies.   Often, men feel caught between a rock and a hard place, expected to fill the old-time breadwinner role and the new superdad model at the same time, while men are making adjustment, we also know who is making the decisions in our own household. This is scary to many,  the unknown is the new Experience for men as was the going from the household to businesses for women.   Are men still supposed to be the breadwinner? Will their wives think less of them if they step off the fast track? If men are confused, and women are learning these NEW roles, then that surely leads to "LACK of confidence"
If work/family pressure is taking a toll on the kids or the marriage, how can we have confidence in the Markets? And who is supporting their partner best? Many of men witnessed their own mother struggle with the dual responsibilities of raising a family and building a career, and now they find themselves in a similar conundrum. Once again creating LACK OF CONFIDENCE. 
While men in general and fathers in particular are going through a time of ambiguity, the shift in roles is already bringing tremendous benefits to both men and women, however its "work in progress." The more our communities and employers can acknowledge, recognize, and support these changes, already well under way, the more concerns like closing the gender wage gap will have to happen...... Let me be clear WOMEN still EARN $0.80 on the Dollar and in some communities even less. So this shifting is bringing less money into the households, because Men who are now in these rolls are no longer earning the bigger paycheck.  So now how can there be confidence when some Women are not making enough to afford great day care, which also does not allow for saving enough for education for their kids, enacting child-friendly laws and policies, and advancing work- life balance will become family issues, not just women’s issues. However EQUAL pay policies are needed like yesterday.....  There are more single Mothers raising their kids and doing a balancing act of family and careers. As the genders work together to redefine womanhood, manhood, and the family, our children will thrive and our society and economy grow stronger in "The Future." 
But before we get to that point we have to go through great adjustments and growing pains. You may want to read this link The problem: Men are trained to be independent, but women are trained to be inter-dependent. The  "LACK of confidence" in our Economy will be with us for awhile until we make the necessary adjustments.


11/23/2011

What are the Right or Wrong reasons for marriage these days?

I'll admit I'm confuse as to Why people rush into  marriage these days! 
I thought I knew the answer years ago.... Now I'm not so sure anymore. If you looked at the Kim Kardashian and Chris Humphrey's marriage which was over lightning-quick then you might look at these Wrong and Right reasons below and realize that you should take your time before jumping the broom. I've considered, Unfortunately,  getting married a few times after my first marriage ended.... simply because I like being in a long-term relationship, however the real test for me is if we can  make it as an exclusive  couple for  2 years or more.... this simply hasn't happened so far.... and that's the truth. So whether you're talking about your first marriage or a second or a third ...... these  (5) Wrong and (5) Right reasons may help you get a realistic picture as to why a strong percentage of all marriages fall apart. 


    Wrong Reason #1: Sexual attraction
    Too many people confuse sexual attraction with love and that can lead to a short-lived marriage (maybe a couple of years if you are lucky.)  The novelty of being with someone will turn  anyone on in the beginning.  But when the sexual attraction wanes, if there's no mutual trust and a joint view of the future, the marriage fades as well. Sexual attraction between two people is a good thing and energizes the marriage, but if the foundation isn't based on strong communication and shared values, the chances of a long-lasting marriage based solely on animal attraction aren't going to last.
Right Reason #1: You are good at working out your differences.
Research (not mine, because here is where I've come up short) indicates that one common theme among long-lasting marriages involves an ability to work out conflict. All relationships have conflicts.  The couples that can talk out their differences, surmount the conflict, and agree on a compromise  will outlast the couple that can't. The partners that trigger anger and resentment in one another or are unable to talk about their differences often can't sustain marriage, or even a conversation. So work on resolving issues. 



Wrong Reason #2: Escaping the family

Many single young women feel stuck living at home. When a potential mate appears, they often leap at the opportunity to extricate themselves from their parents' home and get engaged and run to the alter. Often it doesn't matter to them if their potential mate is a good match because of their need to separate from their parents. There are many ways to escape a family, start by working on getting  your own apartment and living alone for  awhile, be independent it helps you establish your life's goals. Making a lifelong commitment with someone who isn't a worthy partner isn't the best choice, so take  your time.  


Right Reason #2: Sharing common interests
If married couples share common interests, it cause engender closeness and mutual experiences. Experts say that couples don't have to share all common interests, but having enough of them encourages spending time together, a key ingredient to a successful marriage. Those commonalities can be as varied as spending time with their children, loving travel, following sports as long as they both appreciate something together. OK we guys have mixed feelings on sports, because we may have to explain the plays and can't enjoy the game without you interrupting. But if you can just sit and cheer when we cheer then we are happy to have you watch the game with us. 

Wrong Reason #3: The infatuation syndrome
Too many people confuse infatuation with love, you need to  Overcome the Myths that Hinder a Happy Marriage. Infatuation is for kids not Adults.  Infatuation is defined as a fleeting feeling for someone, whereas love is long lasting and is based on trust and commitment. Infatuation is instantaneous and some experts suggest can be hormonal.  Love has patience whereas infatuation has a sense of urgency and often that urgency fades. When marriages are based on infatuation, the zing is gone in less than no time, and you start  assuming you married the wrong person and start looking for a new relationship..... again.




Right Reason #3: Your partner fills your needs, not your wants

Way Too many people get married for what they want instead of what they need! For example,  many expert suggest making a list and  discussing your  fictional wants with your husband, except this genre doesn't interest him on less he is willing to contribute, so now you know what should be scratched of the list. If you are realistic about your needs he might listen.  To have a solid marriage your needs should be shared needs therefore shared with someone who is reliable, trustworthy, and willing to work hard towards common goals. Marrying someone who meets your needs will  enabled the marriage to last.

Wrong Reason #4: You think getting married will solve your problems
If your mate easily gets angry with you and frequently loses control, it can be a telltale sign that problems in the relationship are right around the corner. But many people ignore the signs. They see signs of troubled behavior but think it will get better when they get married.  Often if this irascible or abusive behavior occurs in the engagement period, it will only get worse after marriage, even if  the person is in counseling or therapy, delay marriage until you see that things are getting better. Some people think they will fix it after they get married..... NOT going to happen.  
Anything that is mildly annoying will become extremely annoying after you say  "I do."


Right Reason #4: Your plans for the future line up

Talking about a couple's expectations of the future is one of the surest ways of making sure you're both on the same page and share common values that can sustain a marriage. Many couples don't talk about whether they want to have kids, (surprises in this area is not a good thing)  where they're going to live, whether they'll be a one or two career household. Some people think things will work out magically when they get married, but that won't happen. The more you discuss your common visions for the future, the greater the chances the marriage will last.


Wrong Reason #5: You're head-over-heels in love

Falling in love, too many people get blinded and don't really get to know their mate.  What really keeps people together is their friendship, intimacy and supporting each other. If you ask yourself, "If I lost my job or had a medical scare, whom would I go to for comfort and support?" that answer might reveal the real love of your life, if its not your mate..... then the answer is clear.

Right Reason #5: You make each other feel special

One factor in successful marriages is making your partner feel special and worthy, particularly for men. Because the friendships men establish often don't have the depth of women's relationships, men depend more on their spouse to feel special. When women say, "I love you, you make my life exciting," or make their mate their favorite dessert, it goes a long way to affirming their mate and contributing to a happy marriage. We men know that we do things in the beginning like bringing flowers and make plans for vacations and romantic dinners as part of the romantic stage. So we need to be encouraged to keep doing it continuously after a few years, that take effort and willingness. 

Honeymoon or Vacation for Two, anyone ?

11/15/2011

Common mistakes men make

Some men – not all – have been known to be clueless when it comes to dating a good woman and staying in a relationship with her.  No matter how sincere you are, good women will walk if a man is guilty of any of the common mistakes. Check them out. 
Before we deal with the "Do Nots" you may want to understand a few things.
Fellas: Are you a breast man? Butt man? Or do legs drive you wild? If you appreciate an hourglass figure, smoldering eyes, or humble breasts....... the following can give you hidden clues about your relationship style  based on Research.
Ladies you may also want to read this so that you understand what is happening and why!

If you like her Eyes

Their hidden meaning: You’re probably thinking of how her eyes say “I want you.” So subconsciously, you’re thinking about babies. For example: Men with blue eyes are more likely to be attracted to women with blue eyes.They want babies with blue eyes
Your stealth flirtation strategy: Once you catch her looking at you from across the bar, maintain eye contact for a moment longer than you would normally. If she holds your gaze it’s a good indicator she’s down for a drink or two.

If you like her Smile

The hidden meaning: You’re probably thinking of how her smile says “I like you too.” A woman's genuine smile is the one thing that will let you know if you can hold her attention. If you can get her to smile without any effort then you are on a level playing field. Obviously your approach is what will make the difference between her smiling automatically or not. So if she smiles when she sees you,,,, you can at least approach her.

If you like her Breasts

Their hidden meaning: If you like smaller breasts, you may be more likely to settle down. When men are shown pictures of breasts in five sizes ranging from small to extra large, researchers found that men who preferred larger breasts also had lax attitudes toward sex and favored short-term commitment. 

If you like her Curves

Their hidden meaning: When researchers tracked the eye-movements of men looking at photos of women, they found the majority of men looked to the torso first when judging the attractiveness of a woman. The reason: Subconsciously, you’re seeing if she’ll make a good mom. 

If you like Her Body—And Only Her Body

The hidden meaning: If you’re more concerned with her shape than her face, you’re not thinking about settling down. (Surprise!) OK, so you don’t need research to tell you that one. 

If you like Nothing about her
The hidden meaning: If your buddies are drooling at the Tilted Kilt waitress but you’re just asking about the wings, that’s a sign you’re happy with your relationship you are in. (Or maybe you’re just whipped.)

I hope that gives you a little to think about..... NOW lets talk about the Don't.

10 Dating Turnoffs for Women !

Don’t be Overconfident and overbearing
Sometimes this is considered the hardest thing for any guy to do right. Being confident is very important, however if you  look her in the eye with that look that says "are you ready to get it on, right now" she’ll notice right away. Being overly sexed is a huge turn off to women; it either means that you have too much self-confidence  or that you are in a hurry to get her in bed.... before getting to know her first.

Don’t be overly Aggressive

If a Guy thinks a woman likes him he can be pushy at times if they’re looking for sex.  Especially if they are inept at reading the signals women send their way. If you know (not just think) the two of you are in agreement on the sex, then go for it, but leave room for "STOP, I'm not ready." Trying to get naked too fast is off-putting to many women. So, keep calm and carry on with the right moves, the rewards will be all the sweeter at the right time.

Don’t be a Slob, show some class.
Just because Ashton Kutcher and Charlie Sheen can get away with looking like hoboes doesn’t mean you can. Look presentable and have good hygiene. In other words, don’t go into this with bad breath and last week’s laundry or walk around with your pants hanging way below your behind. If your date sees that you’re not putting in the effort to make a good first impression, why should she bother with you?

Don’t be Rude
Be respectful not only to her, but to everyone you encounter along the way. If you’re treating the restaurant staff like trash and insulting them without reason, your date will assume that you’re going to treat her the same way. The last thing any woman wants is to be disrespected or talked down to. Don’t fake it either. If you are an A$$, it may work out for the first few times until she gets to know the real you. So, if you act like this in general, work on changing yourself first instead of looking for someone else to inflict your rude behavior on.

Don’t be Married
OK, I'm not player hating here. One of the worst things to do - EVER - is to lie about being married or separated. Typically, women don’t like being a home wrecker, or discovering that they are one. If you are currently separated, be up front about it. If you’re married, don’t even think about dating. However if you are separated you may be able to convince her that you weren't happy in your marriage so meeting knew people is your way of finding the answers to what you want.... Good luck she might just think you are confused and are not ready to move on! Smart women don't want to be rebound lovers.... 

Don’t be Stereotypical
If you’re on a first date and you say “Oh, so you’re that type of woman”, it’s pretty easy to assume she won’t be back for a second date. Jumping to conclusions about your date from the way she answers a couple of your questions is a 100% full fledged mistake. You have to let her answer the question in her own way before you arrive at any conclusions about her. However if you are stuck on stereotypes and those stereotypes lead to pretty much your stereotypical behavior, then I guess you will find yourself in the same situation, often. Where no matter what.... all women look and sound the same to YOU. 


Don’t be Distracted
Put your cell phone on silent or better yet, turn it off. Checking your cell phone every 15 mins sends the wrong message to your date. It says that you are not engaged in the conversation, which means you’re not interested in her. No one likes to have to fight for attention. Remember your manners. You have to tune out the Instant Mgs and focus on who you are talking to in person.

Don’t Be All Business
Some guys are fantastic salesman or great negotiators, which means they can talk about business 24/7. But, it’s not good to turn your dates into business transactions. There is a time and place to do business, and a time and place for leisure. If things work out with your date, it’s going to be better if she knows she can relax with you instead of being consistently uptight and focusing on the next big transaction. Let me explain.... Women want to know that you are success oriented, but talking about your latest business deals and where and how, can be boring to the lady she may not want to understand all that stuff, instead she may want to know about how you will sweep her off her feet...... 



Don’t Be a Showboat

Maybe you have access to the Company Jet and you just flew in from Italy helping them solve their debit crisis, or have a timeshare in St.Maarten/ St.Martin and you just received a huge annual bonus, don't flaunt your good fortune on your first date. While she might be impressed and all that does sound great, it’s not going to be enough if money is all you have going for you. Also, it’s not good to advertise your material wealth. In order to guarantee that second date, it’s best to let her get to know YOU and not what you own. But if You can afford to fly her to a exotic spot for dinner, she might be impressed to the max. Ask yourself this question however --- So what do you do for an Encore? 



11/10/2011

Where have you been all my life?

We go online these days for almost everything, even tips on finding that Special someone. From learning how to date, getting over fear of commitment, to first dating tips, here's where you'll find everything you need to know about  dating, selecting a life mate, and latching on and securing "Mister perfect," your dream husband in the real world. 

www.WeHaveTheAnswerForYou.com 
There is no such website, CD, video or book that will do exactly what you want, especially if you are in a  confused state of mind. 
Relationship experts cover topics for everyone in cyberspace. If you are  recovering from a divorce, or a breakup you are in a different state of mind. So why are you at the wrong place? No one is on this beach but you. Well, these sites offer a one-size-fits all dating formula. Their mission is to help a few get back into the dating game by just following their advice therefore making them successful Matchmakers of the very few. Hell they even have you covered, they pinpoint the ideal place where singles can meet to find friendship, romance, love, and even long lasting connections. Based on a Computer AppThey make it as easy as possible to get back into the dating game..... To start searching for Singles near you simply visit their website. Once you're on the inside you'll be able to take advantage of a wide variety of features, all for free! You can create a detailed dating profile, add up to 20 photos, view other singles their system matches you up  with others based on your profile, search for matches, or contact other members. I'm a Software engineer so I know how these Apps work. They match keywords that is about it. The Keywords you pick connects to others Keywords in a database, so you are matched up based on similar Keywords...... Rocket Science?... Not really ... but  Sometimes it works because people believe it. 
OKAY, here I go again. They don't know anymore about matching you up than you do..... If you have been in a relationship before, you did something right in the beginning of that relationship. I'm not an expert on you, your like, your dislikes, so I can't write a Application program that will pick a perfect mate for You!  But I am a man and I know what attracts me to a lady. Since most women believe that all men are alike.... then one man's opinion is all you need..... Right? So do you want to know a secret to attracting a wonderful man? 
Just Be seen in public in a JOYFUL mood. That's it? That's it! It sounds simple, doesn't it? But many single women have trouble attaining such a playful mood in public, and accomplishing it takes self-mastery and focused intent, which will immediately put you in a category apart from all others. A happy and spontaneous woman with a warm smile who's obviously in a leisure moment, and not too occupied to pay attention to social overtures, is much more likely to receive attention than a woman who's rushing somewhere on a vital mission, head bowed in anxiety, face stiff with the fear of an unwanted approach. 
He will react to your energy, if you are joyful. And most single women in public act as though they want to avoid what they actually wish would happen:  would make intriguing small talk with a man of Denzel Washington-like charm
Feeling confident in public places widens the range of eligible men to whom a single woman will be exposed. And it lessens the chances of being approached by the truly predatory, who are more interested in the wounded, fearful, and anxious. 
Click on Think Safety First

First, identify a public place and turn it into your personal parlor. Find a place where you feel comfortable visiting with friends, eating a meal, or having a cappuccino and reading the paper, alone from time to time. Get to know the staff and management, and become a recognized and welcome customer.This need not be a bar. 
But it does need to:
  1. Be within easy walking or driving distance from your home
  2. Be open as many hours a day as possible so that you can alternate times when you visit
  3. Have a social atmosphere congenial to you (your type of music, your type of food)
  4. Have a friendly service staff that you can joke with 
  5. Offer comfortable chairs where your feet reach the floor (if you're short)
  6. Have lighting soft enough to enhance your skin and strong enough to read by (you look intelligent  when you are reading something)
It may be a cafe, or a neighborhood restaurant that serves breakfast on the weekends, or a place where you can drop in for a double espresso and read the paper after Grocery shopping. Perhaps it could become  your favorite restaurant where you can eat a snack or a full meal, depending on your mood.
Consciously make this place your hangout (your spiderweb). Make this comfortable spot the place you have lunch with your girlfriend (preferably a married girlfriend, other wise she is your comp.) once a week,  or meet new acquaintances for a drink or coffee. You will look relaxed in your zone. Get to know the names of the service staff, and tip well, so that when you show up everyone recognizes you -- and they'll always note when you're talking to someone new. Joke with the staff which make you laugh.  Become a favorite customer. In particular, get to know the hostesses in such places because they are like the captains of the ship and watch everyone who comes and goes. You'll never fear being approached by a weird stranger once you feel surrounded by friends.     If you're going to be seen with friends, make sure they are a delight, so that you laugh and smile frequently. If alone, make sure you look around you frequently and make eye contact with someone occasionally. If you cultivate the right place, it will feel like a home away from home. And you will notice who comes and goes. Feel free to relax and be receptive to eye contact and smiles from people you don't know . . . yet.  Why not? You've created your own safe, public parlor.  
It beats chilling at home texting people you already know will not make the grade.
Certainly, at first you'll probably have to consciously create the circumstances in which to relax in public. Then, you can expand and similarly create other public spaces in which you feel "at home" enough to receive attention from men. Say, you branch out to a local bistro where you can listen comfortably to some music on a Saturday evening. Remember, you're in charge, not the space, not the people around you. When you do this, your face will relax enough to invite an approach from a man who is assertive enough to make a small overture, and healthy enough to choose a confident woman with whom to do so.
I recommend that any single woman who wants to meet more men practice the discipline of socializing where she can give and receive mild flirtations without endangering herself or feeling anxiety. Think of it as a discipline in public. Walk that razor's edge of being both relaxed and alert to the World around you, and you will never feel dis-empowered in a social situation. The end result? You'll meet a lot more of the kind of men you want to meet.  
REMEMBER: This is about you applying your own personal style, to the above suggestions. Do what makes you comfortable. But remember to become the best You, you can be. If you remember how that worked before, then it will work again. Someday, someone will walk into your life and make you realize why it never worked out with anyone else.
Who knows you will Possibly be asked:
"Where have you been all my life?"



Vacation for Two, anyone ?


11/07/2011

Lower your gazes...... It's all about r-e-s-p-e-c-t.


Most TV shows and movies portray women as conquests, ready to be submissive to the guy. Most hip hop lyrics involve the words “B****s and H**s when speaking of women. So what? This is the Western World "this how we do it!" But do we really like to see other men disrespect women, we admire?
Check out these 2 Videos from Dr. Drews Life Changers, with Paul Carrick Brunson
  1.  Instant DISRESPECT  
  2.  Resolving the Anger from Relationship Issues
Where am I going with this?
Ever heard the Lenny Kravitz song “American Woman.” It goes something like this: “American woman stay away from me…”. Well, I tend to think that the Western women are the ones who need to be concerned if they are falling for Foreign Muslim men. Why am I writing about Muslim men? Obviously, I am not a Muslim. So, I’m talking mostly about Muslim men who pursue Western women (non Muslims,) and have the audacity to get upset when Western men pursue the woman from their countries. I know non Muslim Westerners misbehave when it come to respecting women. Heck,  some Westerner men treat Westerner women like sexual objects often.
Men can always say "I'm sorry," after the fact, but the damage is already done. 
Many foreign born men do not respect Western women either and view them as some sort of plaything. The liberated women are viewed as promiscuous and even foul mouth Equals to Western men. Maybe this contributes to the way the Foreign Muslims views Western women, but this also makes Western women most desired by Muslim men (which is in contradiction to their religion.)
Dating Muslim Guy.. No Sex Before Marriage!  Why am I mainly talking about Muslim men? It all comes down to pure and simple lack of   R-E-S-P-E-C-T.
Muslim men should know better! They should behave better! And follow the teachings of the Quran!
On to my point of though,  I can not fathom the rudeness that foreign born men  have shown to Western women and then dismissed it by saying “Oh, she’s a Westerner.” They say things to women that they would never dream of saying to a woman from their own countries ( maybe they do but we Westerners will not hear about it.) I know this because I have witnessed it first hand. I see Muslim men lowering their gaze in front of women from their country but looking at Western women as brazenly as they please. I have witnessed Muslim men opt to not even speak to a woman from their country but then turn to a Western woman and make an attempt at flirtation. Then, if or when they are scolded they respond with: “Oh her, she’s an American.”  Makes me wonder if they watched commercials for No tanning lines Bikinis.  Do they react with cat whistles...... bark like Dogs like Western men?
Another thing, foreign born Muslims are always  looking to marry Western women. Often they could care less if she is a Muslim or a non Muslim. They just want to marry an American. Why? I guess some of them want citizenship, money, or Permanent Residency status.  Actually I'm sure that is the main reason. Maybe some of them like the Western sisters and don’t care what her beliefs are (Not likely).

What I do know is, there are many lovely sisters who are born in their own country and are being passed up for marriage simply because the Foreign Muslim men want to marry an American (again Muslim or non Muslim). After which she is forced to become a Muslim woman. Many Western women often get marriage proposals just by walking down the street or in a halal grocer. In other words, Western women are in high demand! Well, this is where it gets downright ridiculous they are being treated as an object and often that is the reality of how they are viewed. My reaction to Foreign Muslims is,
Find another “Match.”  I'm amazed that many Muslim men live in counties like South Africa that have Bikini Parades (see below) for worthwhile causes like Cancer, I guess they must freak-out on the days when a parade of women walk by them on the streets dressed only in bikinis.
If you’re Muslim and seeking your life partner, Muslima.com is an excellent place to start in your online search for the right one for you. If you’re looking for a site built by Muslims for Muslims, then Qiran.com is the place for you. MuslimFriends.com is devoted to helping you meet the perfect partner with whom to develop companionship and eventually marriage. One of the more frequently visited Islamic matrimonial sites; Muslims4Marriage.com has a number of options available to both its basic and premium users.
This isn't to say that all Muslim men behave disrespectful to Westerner women. In contrast, I have met several Muslims who are very respectful around women.  As with any other religion, or culture you are sure to find both good and bad in the bunch.

The fact is as I said before, Muslims should behave in accordance to their teachings. Those Muslims who do act disrespectful should fear Allah and treat all Women with the respect they deserve.  It doesn’t matter what a woman’s race or religion you are to lower your gazes (Muslim religious instructions from the Quran it doesn’t say “lower your gazes for women from Saudi or Egypt but look brazenly at the

Western women.” It says lower your gaze, period.  “(O’ Prophet!) Say to the believing men that they cast down their looks and guard their private parts - that is purer for them; surely Allah is aware of what they do. And say to the believing women that they cast down their looks…”

Tell the believing men to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things). Verily, Allah is All-Aware of what they do.

I hope these suggestions will help Muslim men in their searches, this may prevent them and the Western woman's family from going on the war path....... Western families are not going to accept you disrespecting Western women no more than you would accept Western men disrespecting Muslims.





I don't think there will be many Muslim men walking around on St. Martin's topless and all Nude beaches this season....
 Rentals near beaches on St Maarten/St Martin