Why men are at times very Afraid to Say "will you marry me"

8 things that terrify men when it comes to marriage commitment.

Surprise, surprise! Staying committed to one woman for the rest of our lives isn't a husbands' biggest concern. We did freely choose to get married, after all. But that doesn't mean a man is fear-free about marriage. Issues like putting him second in your life and bashing him with your friends may scare us most. Husbands' fears are rooted primarily in rejection and self-consciousness.  Read on for eight common fears husbands have about marriage, plus expert advice on how to ease them.

1. He'll be on the back burner.

With kids, jobs and more vying for your attention, it's easy for a husband to feel like he's second best, or last on your to-do list. As marriages progress, men often feel that all they're good for is a paycheck.  To remind your husband that he's still important to you, have one-on-one time each day with no talks about kids, in-laws, money or your pet.

·         2. You'll turn into your (or his!) mother.

He loves the charming qualities you possess that remind him of his mom—likes your superhero parenting skills and incredible work ethic—but he doesn't want (or need) two mothers. Likewise, there are probably a few things about your mother that get on his nerves. And many husbands worry their wives will inherit those characteristics. I suggests acknowledging the situation with something like, "I know my mother annoys you sometimes. Let me know if you notice me doing those same things." It's a simple way to allay this fear.

3. You'll talk badly about us with your friends.

Some men .feel  that their wives were using their girlfriends as a sounding board when couples go through a rough patch in their marriage. "While I'm all for a wife having a shoulder to lean on when  fighting with their partner, I hate thinking she's having a husband bashing-session with her female buddies. Our pals are our emotional support system, but running to them after every marital argument usually means you're looking for them to side with you. The problem with that is it reinforces what a 'bad' guy your husband is, Instead, take the issue up with your spouse. You'll learn more about each other and boost your bond.

·         4. You'll use the bathroom with the door open.

Sounds silly, but this is a real an annoyance  for many men. Why? Without boundaries, he may start feeling like you and him are the same person. One of my buddy explained that his wife has made an effort to keep trips to the bathroom separate throughout their relationship. “You already live together—no one longs to be invited in while you grace the porcelain throne.Closing the bathroom door can help you still feel like two separate people." And it's worth the work to keep the allure.Maybe his and hers Master bathrooms are even a better Idea.

5. The sex will stop.

"How do you get a woman to stop having sex? Marry her," LOL. OK that is BAD joke. Although marriage offers security, trust and a deep connection, the downside is it can make you lazy we  assume that  sex would end because "I couldn't imagine my parents or grandparents doing it. I learned after a decade of marriage there's no reason not to make love. "If you're truly committed to making each other happy, sex is how you reward your spouse for putting in effort. But what if you're exhausted? I suggests getting your husband's help with chores by asking him to pitch in when you need him and offering positive reinforcement (hugs, kisses and gratitude) when he helps. Or try being direct with him: "If you give me a hand, we'll have more time for sex later." Wow, I'm in!

· 6. You won't have things in common anymore. 

Chances are, you shared an interest that brought you together, and he doesn't want you to give up that part of yourself. an old saying: "Women marry men in hopes they'll change, while men marry women in hopes they won't change." Knowing this, ask yourself what may be different about yourself since you got married. If you once loved running, why don't you do it anymore? Because other obligations in your life are keeping you from it? Because it's hard to keep up with your partner? Then, remember how much you enjoy your shared interests and push past resistance to do it again every once in a while,  The benefit of reconnecting with your husband outweighs the time and effort it'll take to make it happen.

7. You'll try to change him.  

Just as he fears losing the bond that first brought you together, he doesn't want you to change who he is now. "What you see is what you get" is more than a line . Let me explain:  when you first date each other, you put your best foot forward, and when you relax, every trait comes out more. A lot of women feel that they can change a man, and men rightfully resent that. But there are issues, like smoking, drinking and relying too much on his mother (which is all too common!), that warrant addressing. When suggesting changes, come at him gently and lovingly. If you go after him with what you don't like,(like insisting that he grown up and act his age and not his shoe size) it's sure to backfire. And don't hesitate to seek professional help for those larger problems.

 8. Alone time will be non-existent.

Whether it's to read the paper or watch the game with the guys, he's afraid he'll never have a second by himself as your marriage continues on. It behooves both spouses to enjoy time on their own. If he has a chance to reboot(not just PC needs this from time to time), he'll be a better husband, so it's a win-win for both partners. Sure, you may resent him when he's playing golf instead of helping you with the kids, but it only benefits your marriage when he comes home rested and relaxed.You're only as good to the people around you as you are to yourself. So be sure to do what you love on your own or with your friends.

I tried thinking of a few more but I think 8 is more than enough for women to see why men could have serious reservations on this subject of marriage.