Some women enjoy being in control during sexual encounters.

When it comes to taking control in the bedroom, most men like to dominate. This can sometimes speak to stereotypical gender roles where a man is supposed to be large and in charge (even if he has a Napolean complex.) While most women do not mind this, there are some women who like to change it up a bit and be the ones cracking the whip in the bedroom - pun intended. Yes, some women like to be dominant during sex, and just like a 41-year-old woman I met from Johannesburg told me, most men can be taken aback by this. she gets turned on by a man relinquishing all his masculinity to her and allowing her to steer the ship when it comes to sex. Women find nothing sexier than a man who is secure enough in his sexuality to allow a woman to be in charge and leave all the pleasuring to her. People in positions of power like to be dominated in bedroom too, I guess. According to a study done by some sociologists , and published in the journal Social Psychological and Personality Science, social power reduces inhibition when it comes to the bedroom. the study specifies that the higher your social ranking more powerful you feel, the more chances of being submissive in bed, as a woman. A study, which involved 14306 participants, found that power frees people from their inhibitions and increases sadomasochistic thoughts in everyone, especially when it comes to women being dominant and women being submissive. She wants to decide the positions, the duration and what she would like for the man to do during the session. It is very sexy. However, in my view, most men have a problem with this. Some men flat-out protest the idea of being tied up (even with his owntie) or subdued (with handcuffs)and allowing a woman to do as she please. Men tend to insist on taking over and when she protest, there tends to be a bit of struggle of power. Most of the ones who give in, she usually never hear from the guy again.

So what exactly is involved in a woman being in charge in the bedroom? It involves, among other things, a man keeping his hands to himself, unless told otherwise. One of the most orgasmic positions that a woman can experience is the woman on top position. It allows her as the woman to control the level of penetration as well as the movements. Women know their G-spots and how to make themselves reach orgasm, she simply may choose not to leave that to a man in the hopes that he will do it properly. Men tend to want to control the thrusting or how her body moves in order for them to satisfy their level of pleasure. A woman may tell the guys to please keep their hands to themselves, unless she tells him to move it to a particular place that she likes. I beleive she honestly thinks that allowing women to please themselves with a man's assistance as a man is one of the most selfless things you can do as a man, and I find that extremely erotic. Being dominant also involves speaking up, which is something that a lot of women are afraid to do. Women are afraid to take charge of their sexual pleasure and usually take what is given to them. Speak up; say 'I want you to do this to me' or even stop him and say 'no, you are not doing this properly'. "This is you being in charge of your sexual satisfaction. Although it takes a special kind of man to comply, if you find one, it is orgasmic." Sexologists weigh in on the subject Most men dislike a dominant woman in the bedroom as they feel emasculated.

"Some men believe that it's only men that should initiate sex in bed, [and] therefore can dislike women that would initiate sex. The general rule of thumb is that whoever initiated the sex chooses the sex position and controls the intensity, therefore potentially creating under-par performances. "Under-par performances are a result of anxiety and loss of control. A dominant woman challenges the idea that men are mighty in bed, and men see her as having the potential to emasculate or humiliate them in times of non- performing or below-par performances. Sex therapist says being dominant in bed has a lot to do with one's personality. Dominant and submissive personalities are usually formed in childhood, but negative or positive sexual experiences can sway our preferences either way. Usually, people who need to be dominant all day long in their chosen working environment enjoy being submissive in bed.

Some women think it is a nice and welcome change for them. Society demands that women be submissive and only getting what they need sexually through manipulation, asking or even begging. A true submissive male can sense a dominant woman simply from the over-confident way she walks, talks and operates in her world. Can I have a flavoured condom‚ please? HIV infections decline as campaigns pay off South Africa has made considerable progress against HIV/Aids‚ with a marked decline in the number of new infections since 2009. Final thought Many people believe that being dominant or submissive or switch is something that is ingrained from birth. They believe that they can’t learn how to be dominant in the bedroom or become more submissive, but even if you’re a born dominant, you still need to gain the knowledge and experience to be a good domme. As a woman you can learn to dominate your man skillfully even if it’s not a driving force of your personality. With the right attitude, an open mind and the right tools at your disposal, you will quickly find that becoming dominant in the bedroom is doable, empowering and a lot of fun! Follow these easy rules and you will be well on your way to being more dominant and adventurous in the bedroom. It’s Not One Giant Leap If you jump in too soon, you could have a negative experience that could have been avoided or, even worse; someone could get hurt. Even if you eventually wind up dominating your man hardcore with whips and blades, don’t expect to do that from the beginning. Learning how to be dominant and, perhaps more importantly, be a good domme to a partner takes time. Being a good dominant requires experience. You should start with activities that are less intense or extreme (remember: just playing with power exchange can make things feel more intense!). This way, if something goes wrong, it’s much easier to handle because it’s your responsibility as the dominant to take charge if things go wrong. Knowing you can handle any little — or big — bumps in the road will give you the confidence to tackle more intense types of play and to react calmly when something goes awry. On the other hand, dominating your man doesn’t need to be super extreme. If you only ever feel like commanding him to do a few mostly-vanilla acts (vanilla, in this context, refers to non-kinky sexual activities), that’s okay, too! Just wielding that power can be highly erotic, and the two of you can experience the flow of power between you. Initiating sex and instructing your partner what to do might not be super kinky (what is kinky, anyway?), but it’s a great start and can help you to have better sex! If you, as a man, want to give a woman intense, back-arching, grab-the-bedsheets, screaming, crying orgasms that will keep her sexually addicted to you, then you might find them in private and discreet newsletters.