So who is being selfish? And are some being tooo choosy?

 

Are women who can have children and choose to not have any children being selfish? 

Or are men who refuse to not commit to having a family with offsprings being selfish?

Well the answer is both..... 

Men and women are being selfish these days, however there are many valid reasons why  their choices are what they are... in some cases its the woman who cant have a child who chose a career over having kids. Lets face the facts she is not Able to have a child....And in other cases its the man who is the one who don't want children who just do not want to have children with some women. so the rest of society judge both unfairly.those of us men who make the wrong choices of the women we choose to sleep with, and the women who chose the wrong men to have relationships with. OK this is not like picking a car off of the car lots, so blue is your color... but the interior is not the choice you want it is grey.... Its not that simple. You like how a woman looks her figure 8 is all that until she can't stop eating the bag of chips  so you have no idea how she will look after delivering a baby. Men do not want women  to change, and women want men to change to how they want the men to behave. in some cases neither get what they want... and since this is the cases more often these days... folks just interrupt the progress... of mating. When women could not chose but one man from a tribe, they had limited choices, they did fine....By choosing one from many. And when men could not choose a woman from another tribe the selection was also limited.... LIMITED to what type was available. Therefore  what you settle for. was Cultures  overlap. The things women want these days is more about a man having  possessions. For example his own house, a luxury  that men do not always have before he has a woman.The look men want these days is more about having a woman remain young and beautiful until the day she dies. OK women want the man in her life to look like fit athletes until she gets tire of him being how he behaves.

So what does this have to do with children? We all want catolog selections, because we want our children to look like the gods selection them designed with perfection.. inspite of the DNA mixetures. Have you  ever heard a mother say to her son, "boy you are behaving just like your father" and mean it in a good way?

And  a father who has a daughter that is loud ever say " girl could you turn your volume down, you are as loud  like your mother" and say it in a kind way?

Clearly  the mixes aren't always what we want in the end... but we can be pleasantly surprised from time to time....I'm so glad that the first time I committed.....I selected from a catalog simular to the one my mother was selected from....most men like me who adored their mothers, were not ever dissatisfied in the way their children turned out because their children looked like one of them or had feature from both.

I` date a lovely lady a few years ago who had 2 kids from previous  intangelments and they both looked more like their fathers than she wanted them to look. Neither kid looked like her. talking about wanting a refund on her investment. Well the men were not happy either because they wanted their daughters to look like their mother instead of like them the fathers. So the catelog choices don't seem to workout the way any of us want either

I know that the next generation that came from my ex-wife and me have so far worked out well. I hope that it will continue to work out well. Unlike a buddy who had a one night stand and the baby cameout fat like her mother's mother.

FINAL THOUGHTS 

Back in the day songs like the ones written by artist like Stevie Wonder were about "isn't she lovely, isn't she beautiful" Im not talking about the women... I'm talking about the baby. I could hear you thinking Isn't Stevie Wonder blind? Well yes but he didn't have any unrealistic expectations.

I currently have  one grandson   and it is the general concensus that he is   a handsome little fellow... obviously my son chose well, and his wife did also. Lets see what the future holds when there are more grandchildren....DNA from ancestors can springup in the future generations that we just did not see coming. A quick chuckle moment.. When I was  a young boy, my friends use to tease me that I must be the mailmans son because I must have not been my fathers since I did not look much like my dad, but my second son does look like my father did, and my eldest son and I could pass for twins as babies. And I look like my mother's father, as does my aunts son, BTW his biological father is an European  white man..did that proves what I wrote about. ANCESTORS  DNA can Springup and surprise you! My great grand mother, grandfather's mother was a European woman.

FINAL THOUGHTS

BEING  choosy and some times still not picking exactly what and who you want can lead to disappointments. Maybe having polygamous relationships can be a safer bet.