On the heels of a conversation I had with a good friend about her no longer wasting time and energy on men, who, quite frankly, she stated, aren’t about sh!t and have never presented themselves as such, people often say “Being single will kill you faster than obesity,” She found herself wanting to be more open to men. She said: "I’ve dealt with the major offenses most women have when it comes to men, lately it’s little things that leave me extremely confused and perturbed when it comes to the opposite sex. In fact, it’s one thing in particular that grinds my gears like no other:
A “Send me a pic” request.
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| Smilling faces don't lie they tell the Undisputed truth |
When women dip their fingers in the online realm of dating, the photo request thing is a commonality, if not a necessity, with social media you can see her best pics and decide, to avoid getting cat-fished. But even men whom have met women in real life find it routine, not to mention acceptable, to request a photo of the women within 24 hours of meeting. she is probably thinking : "bruh, you just saw me yesterday; you know what I look like." Social media ... is now Men's new best friend... So why blow it by asking women to do things that goes against their wishes.......
"Just last weekend", my friend said to me, that she found herself in the awkward position of being followed by a police office on her way home from grabbing drinks with a friend. I had to smile as she said: "As I prayed to baby Jesus and all the disciples to make it home safe in this Black Lives Matter era(outside of Atlanta Ga. ), "it eventually became apparent the officer was following me because he wanted to hollah (ask for her number) not handcuff me. I gave him my number because (A) It’s dry in these streets and (B) Is there really a safe way to turn down a man carrying a gun? He sent me a customary “Did you get home safe?” text withing a few minutes of departing one another’s company and I suggested he may want to meet women in plain clothes going forward. The next afternoon he texted her to ask how her day was going, She responded and in turn asked about his shift the night before and then, after declaring, “I’m here to keep you safe baby… your personal bodyguard,” he said: “You gotta send me some pics of that pretty self of you love so I can save it to your name.”
A 5th grade level of texting and a pic request? Hard pass. I never sent the pics; he never sent another text. SMH... She continued to tell me about another experience. "Fast forward to yesterday afternoon when I met an older gentlemen who appeared to be quite distinguished upon meeting him. Though he, too, would prove to have some grammar issues on the texting front, I decided to push through, reminding myself not everyone writes for a living. I even gave him the dyslexic benefit of the doubt when he turned my name into a completely new one even after I spelled it out for him. And I didn’t completely dismiss him when he proclaimed he wants a woman who is strong but not “to strong” (sic) because there can only be one man in the relationship. " SMH...Old school players can not deal with modern day women either???
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| You don't understand women, go read a book! |
It was, however, the “So can I ask for a pic” question that sent her overboard to seek backup ....
In the midst of disbelief that men are still out here just getting older and not wiser, one friend made the perfect observation: “Why doesn’t it occur to men that their first question should be can I call you instead of asking for a pic?”
Fellahs As a hard rule: Don’t ask women for a picture before you ask her on a date. I don’t care if the request isn’t salacious in nature, it just signifies a man’s intent to get something from her before she is ready. And, trust me, I’m no expert on women either but I KNOW ENOUGH not to expect women to bend-over-backwards-for-me when you just meet, she will not be a make-you-jump-through-hoops kinda girl. I don't want those easy to please you, kind of women... But when pics are your priority it sets a precedent — she might get the idea that you are a collector that wants to boast to your boyz about your trophies.
Just as I said before when it comes to unsolicited d-ck pics, we men need to learn to proceed with caution, now that women are more independent . That whole “men are visual” line is a tired excuse for sexualizing women before getting to any type of substance. And, in this case, it's proof the men, young and older, don’t comprehend anything she texted him about wanting to be treated like a basic human being by men instead of some romantic conquest, which is when the lying, posturing, and picture requesting come into play.
Fellahs, if a woman likes you, the pics will come, naturally. Don’t attempt to rush them with a hasty, inappropriate request, or else you put yourself at risk of never getting a pic, much less, anything else from her.
Smiling faces sometimes
Pretend to be your friend
Smiling faces show no traces
Of the evil that lurks within
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