I have to state for the record that this kind of behavior and attitude is not that surprising to to me, please read below. The fact that there are no counseling centers to help people deal with issues like being HIV positive is in it self a crime. When women/men find out they are HIV positive they are sent out in to the streets to deal with it on their own. Very much like a soldier who suffering from the shock of being back in society after being on the battlefield for months if not years. Now go out and function in Society and deal with your screwed up life on your own and affect everyone you come in contact with. and infect those that you don't like. This is crazy stuff. People we are our brothers and sisters keeper. If this woman is is not stopped we can have many people paying a costly price. Unsuspecting wives will get infected. Children can be born HIV positive. I can go on and on. This is not someone else problem this is societies problem. The domino affect can be a total disaster.
Every day, I know which post is going to get the most comments on my page. This one is about to cause a hailstorm.
Dear Zane,
I have a major problem that I'm sure others secretly face as well. I am a single parent of 3 great kids. I'm a Christian that is very active in my church. Basically, I fully know right from ...wrong. But about 3-4 years ago, I found out that I am HIV positive. Since finding out, maintaining real relationships has been a struggle. I haven't told anyone, not even family. The only person that knows is the one that gave it to me. He wants us to be together, but I can't
help but feel this underlying anger towards him. He always accused me of cheating, but, according to my doctor, he had to have been positive for a while. He's already on meds and I am not even close to being on any. All my counts are still great!
I write because I feel anger towards men in general, married men to be specific. They seem to be the ones that approach me all the time. When I'm out, men don't approach me. My self esteem is fine, but I wear glasses, have a space in my teeth and am slightly over weight
(size 14). It bothers me, so I stay in most of the time. Anyway, back to the married men...part of me feels bad for sleeping with them and not telling about my status, but truthfully, the other side of me feels like they shouldn't be cheating anyway. I know it's wrong. I need some advice on how to meet good single men, how do other people
handle dating with HIV, herpes and other related issues. I'm at my wits end and beginning to feel very lonely and isolated. Thanks in advance.
Signed,
Disgusted
Dear Disgusted,
Meeting a good, single man might be difficult because you are blocking your blessings by sleeping with married men and neglecting to tell them that you are HIV-positive. I am not going to get upset with you because you realize that what you are doing is wrong. But I have to urge you to stop the madness immediately. Even if the married men have not respect for their wives, realize that they are probably mothers just like yourself, and they do not deserve to get infected with HIV any more than you deserved it. People handle being infected in different ways. You are going about it in totally the wrong way. You need to get some counseling or join a support group and learn to deal with the anger you are feeling. The man that gave it to you should not even be a factor. Your own kids should be a factor. Do you realize that if one of those other men come up infected that they may kill you? Literally? This is not a game and I am sorry about what happened to you but knowingly infecting others is not a solution. Once you learn to deal with, and accept, that you are a carrier; once you learn to appreciate the fact that you are still alive and have three wonderful kids; once you realize that being active in the church is about more than attending church service and volunteering to collect the offering once a month, you will be more prepared to embrace a good man into your life.
Blessings,
ZaneSee More
Dear Zane,
I have a major problem that I'm sure others secretly face as well. I am a single parent of 3 great kids. I'm a Christian that is very active in my church. Basically, I fully know right from ...wrong. But about 3-4 years ago, I found out that I am HIV positive. Since finding out, maintaining real relationships has been a struggle. I haven't told anyone, not even family. The only person that knows is the one that gave it to me. He wants us to be together, but I can't
help but feel this underlying anger towards him. He always accused me of cheating, but, according to my doctor, he had to have been positive for a while. He's already on meds and I am not even close to being on any. All my counts are still great!
I write because I feel anger towards men in general, married men to be specific. They seem to be the ones that approach me all the time. When I'm out, men don't approach me. My self esteem is fine, but I wear glasses, have a space in my teeth and am slightly over weight
(size 14). It bothers me, so I stay in most of the time. Anyway, back to the married men...part of me feels bad for sleeping with them and not telling about my status, but truthfully, the other side of me feels like they shouldn't be cheating anyway. I know it's wrong. I need some advice on how to meet good single men, how do other people
handle dating with HIV, herpes and other related issues. I'm at my wits end and beginning to feel very lonely and isolated. Thanks in advance.
Signed,
Disgusted
Dear Disgusted,
Meeting a good, single man might be difficult because you are blocking your blessings by sleeping with married men and neglecting to tell them that you are HIV-positive. I am not going to get upset with you because you realize that what you are doing is wrong. But I have to urge you to stop the madness immediately. Even if the married men have not respect for their wives, realize that they are probably mothers just like yourself, and they do not deserve to get infected with HIV any more than you deserved it. People handle being infected in different ways. You are going about it in totally the wrong way. You need to get some counseling or join a support group and learn to deal with the anger you are feeling. The man that gave it to you should not even be a factor. Your own kids should be a factor. Do you realize that if one of those other men come up infected that they may kill you? Literally? This is not a game and I am sorry about what happened to you but knowingly infecting others is not a solution. Once you learn to deal with, and accept, that you are a carrier; once you learn to appreciate the fact that you are still alive and have three wonderful kids; once you realize that being active in the church is about more than attending church service and volunteering to collect the offering once a month, you will be more prepared to embrace a good man into your life.
Blessings,
ZaneSee More
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