Signs He's is Only Interested in Sex!

As the holidays are just around the corner, we should all  recognize the signs as you are last of on someones  list here are a few things that might make you think: "huummm"

1.He only texts you after 11 p.m. and  hints that it's booty call time It's a scientific fact that all booty calls happen after 11 p.m. All those cars you see driving around after 10:59 pm ? People out on the streets past 11? They're most of them it not all  on their way to a booty call.

2. He gets frustrated when you invite him over to watch a movie and actually just want to watch a movie. Most guys would be like, "Alright, cool. If I can't have sex, I guess actually getting to watch  " The Hunger Games" in the entirety: Catching Fire is a pretty good consolation prize." But when you swat away his thigh-climbing hand he's suddenly tired and has to leave, maybe  to the other chicks house. Players always have a backup waiting  on the other side of town.

3. You never meet his or her  friends. The less information you have about him, the easier it is for him to ghost you. If you don't know who he hangs out with, or where he lives, or what his last name is, he can disappear like a phantom into the night. A phantom who banged you a bunch of times and then stopped answering your texts msgs., which would make for a  Broadway play than the kind of phantom that hangs out at the  operas. But a phantom nonetheless.

4.They makes it really hard for you to sleep over. He never straight-up says you have to leave (That wouldn't get .him a next hookup!) but he always has a "thing" really early the next morning. A "thing with friends" or "a work thing" or "some family thing." You know families don't have picnics at 5 a.m. RIGHT?

5. They always hands you everything before you leave. Did you forget your bra? Some lipstick? Your purse? A single bobby pin? If you never forget anything there, you can never have an excuse to show up when he doesn't want you to. If you tried to show up unsolicited anyway, you'd probably find the place abandoned and boarded up, and some neighbor would tell you, "Why, that place has been abandoned for years!" like some episode of "Are You Afraid of the Dark."

6. You've never go on a real date. Dates are for men who consider themselves boyfriends, not men who consider themselves booty call buddies or fiends with major benefits.

7. He always insists on splitting the cost of the pizza you ordered. If one of you doesn't pay for the pizza, it can't be considered a date. He will follow #6 if it kills him.

8. He's "busy" whenever you text him about something personal or emotional. Who has time to pause his game of Madden to talk to you about things like how you feel? If your text about your grandma passing away isn't attached to a sexy picture, he won't even bother opening it. Guys who just want you for sex aren't going to spend time playing the boyfriend.


9. He always tries to initiate sex when you hang out. An easy way to tell the difference between guys who like having sex with you a lot and guys who only like having sex with you is this: Think back to a time when the two of you were together but weren't having sex for more than an hour. If you can't do that, he only wants you for sex.

10. The only thing he's ever bought you that could be considered romantic is a vibrator/massage device. He was like, "Hey, I have a surprise for you," and you could hear a faint vibration, honestly expected you to be pumped about it. winks and says: "So  that you can get ready before I get here!"

11. Every conversation turns flirty/sexual. Every time you talk or text, it immediately turns into a conversation about having sex. He's stopped even trying to be witty about it. "Oh, you're at the grocery store right now, or are you visiting your mom again? I sure would like to have sex with you … at the grocery store, but not at your parents house! <smirking>

12. He texts you to meet up with a group, but wants to go back to your place or his place as soon as you get there. You might think you're about to meet all of his friends at some bar, but when you get there, he's already waiting outside with his coat and some condoms.





13. He only compliments your looks. He loves your BUTT but not your sense of humor. You always look "hot" but never "gorgeous." If his compliments are superficial at best and gross at worst, he's Just Not That Into YOU.

14. When he comes over, he heads straight for the bedroom. There's no loitering in the kitchen or hanging out in the living room with this guy. He has streamlined the process of sex-having by eliminating or minimizing the chitchat or talk about your day. He's like the Philip Glass of booty calls (that was a joke about the minimalist art movement that someone's dad will probably find funny).