“Sapiosexual” ? What is that? Why am I attracted to these types?

If you are a problem solver.
You are a sapiosexual! 

While social media is a space we all go to share things we love (a new haircut selfie, a #TBT, your drugstore beauty haul), unfortunately, it can also be a place where women everywhere experience a ton of negativity and unwanted judgement about their appearances.

 I found myself looking  for what I was always attracted to. 

Over the years, I have wondered about what attracts us to some people more than others. In particular, what attracts us to the opposite sex? Indeed, chemistry between people plays a huge part in our relationships, but there are also certain personality characteristics that draw us to one another. Some people are attracted to physical appearance, others to status or an individual’s personality; whether it is charismatic, friendly, kind, thoughtful or even brilliant.

Recently, a new word has come to my attention that describes what often draws me to the opposite sex. The word is “Sapiosexuality.” As defined by the urban dictionary, a sapiosexual person is someone who finds intelligence and the human mind to be the most sexually attractive feature in the opposite sex. The origin of the word comes from the word sapiens, which means wise or judicious, and the word, sexual.

If you are  just about self improvement.
You are a sapiosexual! with out a doubt!

Looking back on my relationships with women, I realize that I have always been attracted to intelligent women because I believe that the brain is the largest sex organ. Those who admit to being sapiosexual will say that they are turned on by the brain, and tend to be teased or excited by the insights of another person. This means the person who you are attracted to might have a tendency to have an incisive, inquisitive, and an irreverent mind. As foreplay, the sapiosexual person may crave philosophical, political or psychological discussions, because this turns them on. Although the attraction is not always connected to sexuality, it often is. Sometimes, however, platonic friendships between the sexes are also dependent on sapiosexual desires. This intellectual synergy simply fires up the relationship. This is often seen in the workplace and may be viewed as another aspect of being sapiosexual—that is, a desire to be connected with intellectuals, although the outcome is not always an intimate encounter.

If you are like the first Lady.
You are a sapiosexual!
You will attract the Barack type.

Those who are sapiosexual are those who are stimulated or challenged by the way another person thinks. They are basically in love with the mind. Sometimes, sapiosexual individuals have also been called “nymphobrainiacs,” or individuals who find it arousing to engage with the intellectual perspective of another person. To some, the word nymphobrainiac sounds a bit extreme or pathological.

Librarians, teachers and professors or others associated with learning institutions are often targets of sapiosexual persons. In an anthology released a few weeks ago, called,The Sexy Librarian’s Big Book of Erotica, (link is external)Bix Warden writes in the introduction how librarians are often featured in sexual fantasies. He agrees that the brain is the sexiest organ in the body, and says that intelligence is sexy. Though you don’t have to be a librarian to be sexy, he states that librarians are often smart and sexy, read across many genres, and can converse on many different subjects.

If you always seeking knowledge.
You are a sapiosexual! Period!

In so many realms, including sexuality so much of who we are has its roots in our childhood. What happened during our childhoods serves as a foundation of who we are, especially in connection with intimacy. Much depends upon our relationship with the opposite sex parent, our first love experience, and first intimate encounter. Perhaps what we look for in a partner is what we always wanted in ourselves. It also might be the catalyst or portal to knowledge of our deeper selves.

For example, I know someone who, as a child, was told by her mother that she was not smart. For this reason she always craved intelligence in herself and in her lovers. It has long been known that women who were adored by their fathers expect or desire the same in their mates. They tend to stay clear of those who treat them poorly or with disrespect. On the other hand, if a male had a mother who was unavailable, needy or narcissistic, then he will try to receive love from a woman who is also unable to provide it. If you were safe and nurtured as a child, then you will feel safe, valued, and protected by your adult partner. Feeling these sentiments invariably leads to better sex and intimacy. 

I Googled the word "Sapiosexual”  and found the following: 
This  new term for the attraction to intelligence...

“Sapiosexual” denotes a person who who finds a cultured and socially conscious mind the most attractive personality trait of all.

 Sapiosexuals are sometimes referred to as "nymphobrainiacs," according to Psychology Today.
Those who are sapiosexual are those who are stimulated or challenged by the way another person thinks,
They are basically in love with the mind. Sometimes, sapiosexual individuals have also been called “nymphobrainiacs,” or individuals who find it arousing to engage with the intellectual perspective of another person.

The word has officially entered the dating lexicon on OKCupid.
People who use the term obviously intend it to have some sort of communicative value. A quick browse through OKCupid users who identify as sapiosexual in the New York area, for example, reveals some common themes: they’re young, they’re atheists, they live in Brooklyn, they list philosophical and theoretical texts as their favorite books.

 It's quickly becoming one of the most popular dating tags on the dating site.
That was probably the primary reason we haven’t done this earlier,” Mike Maxim, chief technology officer at OkCupid, tells NPR of this and other new terminology. “You know, this has been a feature that’s been requested now for, I don’t know, probably years.”