The Mindful Marriage requires maturity acceptance!

surprise!

Try looking at everything with a new sense of curiosity, and stay open to discovery. That’s when real surprises and magic happens, new never gets old.

Distractions are everywhere, but learning how to be mindful will deepen your relationship with your mate.  Just try really hard to tune out the distractions, because the will never materialize into anything worthwhile.
Your partner starts telling you about his day and suddenly your mind wanders back to work and that email confirmation you forgot to send. Next thing you know, he asks what you think about so-and-so, and you have no clue who he’s talking about. It’s a commonplace scenario, and an oft-cited complaint of couples in therapy: a partner who doesn’t listen.

We don't need phones out here! 

All relationship problems stem from poor communication.You can’t communicate while you’re checking your BlackBerry, watching TV, or flipping through the sports section. If simple distraction, and not something deeper, is keeping you from really hearing all your partner has to say, learning how to be present will enhance your listening skills and your life.

Be right here right now. Anytime you’re swept away in thoughts about the past or future, notice that your mind has drifted and gently bring yourself back to the present moment by focusing on an anchor, such as your breath, a specific part of your body (like the space between your eyebrows or the way the soles of your feet feel on the ground), or sounds of a distant bird in the trees.
Be aware when you judge. Practice paying attention to your thoughts and the judgments your mind tends to make. Don’t try to stop or resist them; just curiously notice them, then usher them out. The point here is to become aware of how often you render judgments, on others and yourself. Awareness of your tendency to judge is the first step to stopping it.

Practice patience. Be willing to see how your experience with mindfulness unfolds. Be patient with yourself when it’s uncomfortable and your mind would rather rush to the next item on your list. It’s just the wandering nature of your mind. Treat it as you would a puppy being trained to sit; bring patience, affection and a sense of humor to the task.

This just  feel brand new!

Be kind to yourself. Mindfulness allows you to recognize and even turn toward some painful thoughts and emotions. When you do, be compassionate toward yourself, just as you would turn with warmth and kindness to a friend having a rough time.
Find beginner’s mind. Sometimes the mind likes to think it has seen all there is to see and knows all it needs to know. Try looking at everything with a new sense of curiosity, and stay open to discovery. That’s when real surprises and magic happens. and Magic has it's surprising moments, which will make you say Wow!

Begin to trust. Tune into your own basic wisdom and intuition. This doesn’t mean always trusting your thoughts. Mindfulness will help you see that thoughts come, go and change. Being mindful is being sensitive to your own  feeling and your partners also.

Don’t strive. Sometimes we come to mindfulness hoping to solve our problems or change and improve ourselves. In fact, wanting things to be different can be an obstacle to truly experiencing mindfulness. Mindfulness is not about being somewhere else, but rather just being with what’s here now.

I accept what your eyes are telling me/

Try acceptance. Accept that things are the way they are in each moment. That doesn’t mean they won’t change or can’t be changed. A wise Buddhist once said that all suffering comes from desire (which is longing for what you don't have). When we desperately want the things in our lives to be different than they are, we feel pain, and it’s that resistance that leads to suffering. If you can stop railing against the way things are (your boss is an idiot, your partner steals the covers) you can calm your emotional waters, which will allow you to be more present.

Let it go. Practice releasing ideas and thoughts that you cling to ; try letting go of the desire for things to be a certain way. Notice what it feels like in your body when you cling versus when you let things go.

This is the kind of Love commitment I've been looking for.

Commit. Mindfulness is a practice,  it’s not just meditation. You can take mindfulness into all aspects of your life. But as with every significant life change, the work is yours and yours alone. There is no question that by becoming a better listener you’ll become a better co-worker, parent, friend, and partner, not to mention how zen your internal world will start to feel. Before you can use mindfulness to improve communication between you and your honey, you’ve got to become a confident practitioner yourself. Make a commitment to meditating and mindfulness as a way of living/being.