Why Women Need Men Who Challenge Them and Visa Versa!

Why Women Need Men Who Challenge Them 

I challenge you that I can  have the most glasses of this  wine!

By Michael Baisden.    It’s easy to become defensive when you hear the word “Challenge.” Too often it’s associated with going into battle or drama. But to be challenged also means to be stimulated intellectually or to invite someone to do better. Unfortunately, not many women meet men who challenge them in that way.
For the past 30 years women have been making huge strides financially and educationally. They read more than men, they graduate at a higher rate, they start more businesses, they travel more, and they purchase more homes. With so many advantages it makes you wonder, what do women need men for? The honest answer is, they don’t!
I believe a man’s true value is not in being needed. In today’s society men should be more focused on being respected. But how can we as men demand respect when we aren’t bringing anything unique to the table? Most mature women are financially stable; they have academic and book sense; and over 80% of them are holding down the household as single parents. Although a man’s help would be appreciated, for many established women, money and help with the kids is not a “NEED”!
What mature and intelligent women long for is quality companionship and stimulating conversation with a real man who leads by example. As a young man I was told, “Nothing turns a woman on more than watching a man handle his business.”
But just as a team is only as strong as its weakest link, a woman’s development is arrested when she’s not partnered with a man who offers the perspective of a strong man she respects.
My responsibility as a man is to bring my resources to the table — intellectual, financial, life experience — and challenge my partner to do the same. At some point, we will have a difference of opinion on a number of issues, but it is through those differences that we challenge one another to grow! As a man, it’s not about being in charge or being right, it’s about making my partner feel secure and challenging her to see the world through the eyes and mind of her man.
The challenge for us men is to gain more knowledge and insight through reading, traveling and listening, to broaden our perspective so that an intelligent woman will respect our point of view enough to listen to what we have to say. We can’t beat our chests and raise our voices believing this is the way to lead. We must lead by our example and strength of character. Only an insecure man would expect a woman to submit to his way of thinking when he hasn’t accomplished anything with those thoughts. And only a woman who is a fool would follow a man who talks a good game but doesn’t have anything to show for it. As I said earlier, most women don’t need a man, but they definitely want a good one … and a strong one.
To put it frankly, a woman can go to the sperm bank to make a baby or use a sex toy to give herself an orgasm, but they’ll never create a device that can stimulate a woman’s mind like engaging in a conversation with a man of depth and intelligence.

two heads are better than one!

My perspective: We are living  in the 21st Century, things have changed significantly  between men and women.... gender rolls are no longer what they were in the 20th Century , as we look at history we will note that things also change from the 19th century where the most progress was made in the 20th century in terms of gender rolls. I often tell women who would see me as someone who thinks somewhat differently.... that I grew up around  strong women (my mother, aunts, and older female cousins) were women of the 1990(s)mentally,  way back when other  women let their men take the lead and they just followed.  

 We have to deal with  Back to back challenges.

This  was not the case in my family, so I knew strong women, who were self-starters from the days when I was a child. My view was of go-getters who consulted their husbands about their initiatives,  but didn't wait for the men to lead them in any ventures. I saw Strong women who felt they could stand on their own two feet, so this  concept  is  not new to me. They were resourceful, I learned to respect women as equals and sometimes even superior minded, never would I put my foot down and insist that things had to go my way , I would always find ways to compromise. If she had an idea that needed some additional analysis and even suggestions I would give my support  freely, even challenging  her to think out-side of the box. Lending a helping hand got me better results than being selfish and wanting just what I wanted, and not caring about her needs and wants. Living  on a two way street, is where most people have to live in terms of relationships. So if you can't deal with two streams of mental traffic... you'd better get on an one-directional road were you are going one way only... never encountering anyone who is doing something different from you. The challenges are great in a World that is changing way to fast to keep up. Challenges are becoming a greater force that divide couples... so two people who collaborate have a better chance of making it and are often a mayor force to deal with. The Obama couple is prime example. 

Loida and Reginald Lewis.

I really like the story about  Reginald Lewis and his wife Loida.  He build an empire and then died from brain cancer, his widow Loida ran the company to greater success because she was his equal and partner when he started.. initially  his subordinate in a wall street law-firm, but in the end his successor. So when you are challenging each other to be  the best you can be you are building a solid foundation.  A foundation  where the other partner  can take over and enhance your dreams if or when the time comes!