Mutual attraction or ...it's a no go.

Simple Signs Your Partner Isn’t Attracted To You


“Love is about mutual respect, apart from attraction.” – George Best

Very few things in the world can be worse than feeling left out or unwanted by the person (you think)  you love most in the whole world. International dating, relationship and intimacy expert Giordana Toccaceli mentions, “If your partner doesn’t desire you as much as you want, you need to take a deeper look at the polarity in the relationship.”

You can find yourself in that situation very easily and it’s not long before you start taking your frustration with the lack of appreciation out on your partner. You might also be second-guessing yourself all the time – stop doing that and instead focus on the signs to look out for that your partner may be losing interest in you and the ways to fix them.

Do you feel what I feel? 

HERE ARE SIGNS YOUR PARTNER ISN’T ATTRACTED TO YOU

1. ROMANCE IS DEAD

You both get caught into your routine and you begin putting up with each other’s presence rather than appreciating it. Romantic date nights are a thing of the past, they no longer seem to be interested in Netflix and chill sessions with your favorite show, and sex is a long-forgotten fantasy.

The way to fix this is to take initiative and plan date nights, trips, cinema visits or even getting more creative in bed – those are all things you can do to spark up your SO’s interest again and make them feel like you haven’t left the honeymoon phase.

2. THEY HAVE NO TIME FOR YOU

This can manifest in many different ways – the most common one is when they make up ridiculous reasons to bail on your plans. If it rubs you the wrong way, then it’s something to look into. Why don’t they want to spend time with you, and what’s changed?

To mend this, you need to talk to your partner. Let them know what you’re thinking and ask for an explanation for their behavior – if they’ve been cold and unapproachable, you deserve one.

3. THEY PICK FIGHTS

Life coach Kali Rogers says, “If you notice a shift in patience that could be a sign your partner isn’t happy with your compatibility.” Any couple can get annoyed with one another, but if things range into a territory that makes you uncomfortable, then they’re probably thinking about leaving.

It’s often the case that if someone’s sensitive to very trivial chores – like not emptying the dishwasher, for example – it’s a sign that they’re actually a lot angrier about something else. The key to fixing this is to stay calm and, the next time it comes up, ask your SO what the real issue is. Once you get to the root of the problem, that’s when you can start solving it.

4. THE SILENT PHONE

Of course, you’re not expected to ring your S.O. every minute of every day – and you shouldn’t expect that of them. It’s normal to have lives outside the relationship, however, it takes only a minute to text or two minutes to call and check how the other is. If that’s happening less and less, or if you find yourself always texting first, this may be a sign that your partner simply doesn’t care enough to check on you.

To overcome this, you should be open with them. Let them know that you need more communication day-to-day – and if they’re worth it, they’ll do everything they can to make you comfortable.

I love this  peace and quiet, I can hear your heart beat 

5. THEY DON’T HAVE PLANS FOR THE FUTURE WITH YOU IN MIND.

If they like to talk about “my” rather than “our” future plans, that can normally be a big red flag.   A truly committed partner will always see you with them in the next two, five, ten or 25 yesrs

Former Newlyweds Expert for About.com Francesca Di Meglio adds, “If you don’t discuss the future, your spouse is no longer expecting to be with you for the long term or s/he’s simply not looking forward to it.”

If they’re dodging that subject, that signals that they’re probably not in it for the long-term. To help this, it’s a good idea to discuss how you feel about your future. Maybe take them to meet your parents, or go on a long vacation. That will definitely show your S.O. that you’re  a long termer!