The actions of the Rubber band man!

Tell me why you are so distant all of a sudden!

Men are like rubber bands, I know many women do not understand what is happening when a man has the need to pull away from her sometimes.
The fact that men are like rubber bands is totally confusing to women,
men can only stretch but so far before they come springing back.
Once a man is hooked he has a need to pull away from time to time to get away from the intimacy cycle. Men instinctively feel this urge to pull away.
It is not a conscious decision or choice. It just happens.
It is neither the man fault or the woman’s fault. It is a natural cycle!

When a man loves a woman, periodically he needs to retreat for better positioning.
Before he comes springing back so he can get closer.

Women often misinterpret a man’s retreat because generally,
a woman pulls away for different reasons.
A woman pulls back when she doesn’t trust him to understand her feelings,
when she has been hurt and is afraid of being hurt again,
or when he has done something wrong and disappointed her.

Certainly, a man may pull away for the same reasons,
but he will also retreat even if she has done nothing wrong.
He may love and trust her, and then suddenly he begins to pull away.
Like a stretched rubber band, he will distance himself and then come back all on his own.

Let me try to explain here; a man pulls away to fulfill his need for independence or autonomy.
When he has fully stretched the distance, then instantly he will come springing back.
When he has fully separated, then suddenly he will feel his need for love and intimacy again.
Automatically he will be more motivated to give his love and receive the love he needs.
When a man bounces back, he picks up the relationship at
whatever degree of intimacy it was at when he stretched away,
he does not feel any need for a period of getting reacquainted again.

Here is what every woman should know about men.   

If understood, this male intimacy cycle enriches a relationship,
but because it is misunderstood it creates unnecessary problems.
Let’s look a little deeper.

When two people are dating and everything is going well.
Everything has been so romantic….
Then without any apparent reason, the guy begins to distance himself emotionally
The woman does not understand why he has suddenly pulled away.
She becomes distressed, anxious and confused.
One minute he is so attentive, and then the next he doesn’t even want to talk
. He becomes distant. The woman starts thinking what did I do wrong.
Am I so awful? She takes it personally. This is a common reaction.
Men do not really tell women that she is being too clingy and too needy when he loves her but he retreats and she is left thinking the worst,
she starts blaming herself. She wants to “fix it” and “change what is happening
” out of fear of losing what she felt was going so.... “right”,
but the more a woman tries to get closer the more the man pulls away
Women need to realize that when they are trying to get closer
while the men are trying to pull away,
they are actually preventing them from stretching their full distance
and then springing back. By running after their men,
women are  preventing them from even feeling that
they need their woman and want to be with them.
Women who have done this in every relationship….
do not understand men and they have unknowingly obstructed an important cycle.
By trying to maintain intimacy they have prevented a stronger bond from being developed.

I can see women Shaking their heads  asking the question;
“how does a man suddenly transform, then?”    

If a man does not have the opportunity to treat,
he will never get a chance to feel his strongest desire to be close to his woman
It is essential for women to understand that if
hey insist on continuous intimacy or find themselves
“running after him” that their intimate male partner treats,
then he will almost always be trying to escape and distance himself;
he most likely will never get a chance to feel his own passionate longing for love
. When a man has to stretch away, his full distance,
he will return with a lot of power and spring. UM hmm,
Once he pulls away and has stretched to his limit,
he begins to go through a transformation,
His whole attitude begins to shift.
The man who didn’t seem to care about or wasn’t interested in his partner
(while he was pulling away) suddenly cannot live without her.
He is now feeling again his need for intimacy.  
This is generally puzzling to women because in their experience when they pull away,
them becoming intimate again requires a period of reacquaintance.
If women do not understand that men are different in this way,
they may mistrust his sudden desire for intimacy and “push him away.”

Men also need to understand this difference.
When a man springs back before a woman can open up again to him.
She generally wants and needs time and conversation to reconnect.
This transition can be more graceful if a man understands
a woman may need more time to regain the same level of intimacy---
especially if she felt hurt when he suddenly became

“the rubber band man!”