Comparative superiority

So is this true love or a power play!

 A woman receiving this kind of hand  treatment is thinking
is he doing this to me exclusively or did he do this  to other women from his past also.

There is such a thing as True love, I believe  with a conviction that grows stronger every day there is someone that becomes “the one!” that you truly love.

Let's examine motives: why do we do what we do and label it  “attraction” or “instant chemistry” or “love at first site” or some kind of ego boosting  infatuation phrase? All men want to do the things that will have a women thinking that she is being treated special.  ‘Hmmm, I Kissed her just right and her head is still spinning. I Held her tenderly and she will not want me to let her go.’  Pay her a compliment that sounds like live music to her ears. I can go on and on. Why do I know so much about this because I have used everyone  of these setups to get what I wanted from a woman over the years. The term comparative superiority is a something I heard for the first time while watch the “Red table talk” with Jada Pinkett Smith, her daughter and her mother and their guest was the former monk Jay Shetty.

It instantly got me thinking about my behaviors in the past. All men go after women that they compare to some degree with other women from their past. She is prettier than the woman I had before, she is sexier that most of the other  women I had sex with, she is so much more glamorous than the woman I took to that dinner with my boss who was a head turner, but this one is a show stopper.

OK women do it also, he is so much  taller than the guys I usually date, he has so much more charm than what‘s his name, He is better looking than all of the guys I have dated in the past. He has to be  “ the One!”

So when do we ever get real about our making comparisons. Aren’t we always doing it to feel superior on some level. Acquiring a new treasure, trophy  wife, conquest. During ther Donald Trump presidency we have all become annoyed at how he would belittle women. And make himself look superior every chance he got. Many of us hate him for what is also our behavioral patterns. We don’t like to see ourselves as the same ego driven crude A$$holes like Trump. We might not do the same kind of things but we all do things that put ourselves in a superior category by comparing ourselves to others.  We want to out shine, out do the next person, or impress the person of interest to the point that they no longer have any interest in another persons, but us.

So why do we try to label it “Love.” Why not call it something else, like “superiority dominance”. Because that 4 letter word L-O-V-E  is disarming... it’s powerful beyond our own controlled imaginations and powers. We say “I love you” not because we really love the other person we say it because of the effect it has on the other person. Wow really? Most of us don’t even know what real love is and why we feel the need to love someone and have that person love us in return, “I love you too” is always a response that we love to hear,  or better yet ‘love me even greater than I will ever love you.’ well no one says that out loud, because we all have filters.

In my view most people think they love someone, because they love the idea of that person, not the real person!

As I’m writing this I’m having so many flashbacks that it might take me hours to compile all that I would want to say about this subject. Maybe I will make it a series of  blog post relating to: “comparative superiority analysis.”   

How many of us can honestly say we love someone

and we don’t judge them, ever?