Compliment what she does!

Send her roses just because!

My dad would have sent you flowers, but I’m only into you for a one-night stand!

Old schoolers behaved like gentlemen, or did they really? Wait! What?  Who really does that?  

When a man compliment’s a woman he: magnifies her strengths, and never her weakness, so then he has actually a good chance of reaching her heart….   

Love songs that were written to touch a woman’s hearts and sell recordings have faded…. and rap songs have replaced them in the worst ways. Is it because previous generations have not demonstrated the way, we men did things, for the women we were “chasing.” And once we stopped “the chase” we became the dud that never showed women that they are appreciated. “Papa was a rolling stone”  didn’t really have a good set of lyrics because it identified that men rolled along hitting and moving on. Where do you think rap lyrics like “ bang it to the curve” originated. Guys these days have no (zero) respect for women and women have less respect for themselves and even have disdain for men. The nice things that gentlemen did…. have just not been shown to these younger flawed relationships we now see. Women driving and cursing the car in front of them with the “F” bombs and whatever foul stuff that comes out of their mouths, sure as hell does not command respect, from her kids, and folks observing them.  I used to think that I’m somewhat responsible for the way my sons treat women. Maybe I can take some credit, but their mother surely can take credit because of how she made them “respect her.” Today ’s woman frustrated with her kids waiting for a bus, in the heat of the day does not have the patience to be nice when she is frustrated and hates the fact that her baby daddies are not stepping up to the plate and taking responsibilities for their offsprings. He has a car but she has to take the bus. And she hates him for putting her in that position. So now her offsprings will have attitude issues.

So where am I going with this? I’m identifying where the problems started.

Bill Withers was not the guy I would emulate. He had a beautiful wife Denise Nicholas. (she starred in TV series: "room 222," and "in the heat of the night")  He had great hits back-in-the-day but in his personal life, he was a woman abuser. The songs were a complete contradiction to what he did to his woman. Maybe he did “send her…. roses just because” in the beginning and sang about the “just the two of us” after he hit her.

Marvin Gay was not the guy I would emulate either.  Songs like “Let’s get it on” and   ”sexual healing” He also had violent tendencies… he would beat the female vocalist who sang love songs with him, he died because his Dad shot him and killed him during an argument they had. Fatherly love!

These are just two examples that I can use that tell a different story, from their public personas.  We sometimes ask “where has love gone…” I can tell you love was fiction back-in-the-day. It was seldom real…. So the fact that relationships were never what they seemed is causing the next generations to emulate all the bad stuff they saw from the previous generations.

OK, you want more? James Brown “I’m black and I’m proud” was not so proud of his actions and abuse against women.

Jim Brown..football HOFer and movie hero. Once threw an actress girlfriend out of a hotel window. When she landed in the swimming pool, his comment was “I didn’t know there was a pool down there.” hmm speaks volumes about his intentions.

Oooh, wait! what about “William Cosby” he was a cool and smooth daddy figure on TV, and in movies, who had to resort to drugging women to have sex with them (rape). He was an actor/comedian he did need to drug women, Oooh, wait he was married! Well maybe “Drugged women” do not remember to call your wife, maybe they were too scared, to tell what you did. Their memories come back years later and then they came after him in numbers, once the realized they were not the only ones he drugged. And now he is in a jail cell almost blind waiting to die in prison.

So now we  wonder about a 50+ year old  R Kelly ”My mind is telling me, no, but my body is telling me Yes”  this is telling a story of how he could not keep his hands off of young girls instead of having relationships with grown women who could defend themselves or bring charges against him, for not having their consent. Young girls can’t give concent  (in the eyes of the laws, it’s statutory rape) so he decided he didn’t need concent.

SMDH. Previous generations of stars have not made it easy for younger guys to emulate good behaviors.   

FINAL thoughts

Heartbreaking and sickening...behaviors is not what men with good characters display to their sons. They become what you as grown men should be the least proud of. Donald Trump did not want his first born son to be named after him, His words “ what if he becomes a looser” well guess what he is exactly what you were afraid of Donald Trump, a copy of you as is his younger brother is too, so you are two for two in the losers department.